The Final Countdown

The Similans

And here it was… the final few days of the trip. While it wasn’t quite over yet there was no more ‘next week’ and I had to actual start planning to get back to Bangkok and start that long ride home… but not… quite… yet…

Khao Lak is the popular name for a region on the Andaman Coast of Phang Nga Province that lies not far north of the Phuket. Khao Lak itself is actually one small village but is now used to describe a larger series of beaches/towns around the base of the mountains in the region. The Andaman Sea itself is the shallow coastal region of the Indian ocean that makes up most of the western coastline of the peninsula that is southern Thailand. That probably doesn’t mean much to you as a reader but in practice for me it meant it was a much less dense collection of tourists than Phuket itself. While the coast between some of the villages definitely had a number of quite swanky hotel there were collections of smaller hotels and guest houses, lots of locals actually living here and a variety of restaurants and shops. The big attractions of the area are two large national parks… one based around the mountains and waterfalls of the interior… the other a marine preserve about an hour offshore. Guess which one I was there for!

I’d ended up booking a strangely named bungalow called ‘The Mouth’ that was about halfway between two of the villages but walkable to both. Unfortunately because my flight was so late and then I had the roughly 1h15 drive I could tell the host was waiting up for me when I arrived. I did get to meet the welcoming party of two adorable mutts named Coffee and Latte before checking in and finally getting the shower I’d been aching for since sitting on the samui beach hours before. Unfortunately I also got the unwelcome news that they were changing my room after the first night. I wasn’t super happy about this as I was being picked up for my dive trip at 7:30 the following morning so I had to actually budget an early enough wakeup to unpack my scuba stuff and clothes for the day, repack (including my valuables) and trust that it would all end up in the new room. In the end it was fine but I grumbled. I had time for a quick glass of juice and a couple bananas before I was picked up and the minibus driver took a kind of baffling route to the pier… first backtracking down the main road then turning back and grabbing people at some quite fancy hotels (I was already debating an extra night here so was checking out prices on the places and couldn’t believe the variety between some very similar looking places.)  Thankfully it wasn’t a full morning trip though as the pier turned out to only be about 20 minutes back south where it seemed most/all of the dive groups around departed. Access to the park requires a licensed operator and a reasonably high daily fee as they make at least some effort at preserving the area but I think they need to do more.

I’d strongly considered doing a liveaboard trip for my dive portion of the trip however prices were VERY high for anything that was still available when I was booking semi last minute. I’m not going to lie, I was also a little scared at how diving would go. I’ve only gone for one dive since losing a bunch of weight and my breath control is definitely still off. Divers will know what I mean, but basically my ability to keep at a level plane in the water by regulating my breathing intake amounts/speed. This combined with your weight belt and the amount of air in your buoyancy vest is what helps you ‘hover’ in the water. I still didn’t really know my weight belt needs at that point since I’m down another bunch of weight since my one dive in Greece last year (I’m closer after these dives but I think I really need a few more dives to zero it in.) In other words I was worried about flailing around like a newbie and wasting air and pissing off someone else who’d paid a fortune to be there too as I made them come up early. Sadly part of being a diving fan who lives in this terrible place for diving. I’m not super enthused about paying good money to go dive in West Hawk lake but there are definitely times when I wish I could go for a refresher dive not long before a trip that wasn’t just dipping in a swimming pool. That said… at this point I was aching to go diving. I know I don’t have many divers among my readers but there’s something about slipping under the waves and entering a different world that is the most soothing thing possible to me so I was absolutely ready.

Once at the pier I was assigned with two girls and another guy to a Spanish dive leader named Caro and we chatted a bit. The two young women were German (which would become a theme) and my personal dive buddy was Piotr from Poland. Eventually all the folks arrived, I gathered our boat was transporting two different dive shops worth of people but it was owned/run by the company I was using. Boarding was somewhat of a herding action as multiple boats were leaving for our group, another company was loading a giant way too large group of snorkelers and two other smaller dive boats loaded very nearby but at least not the same pier. My company was called Sea-Bees and seemed to be fairly well run, though nobody asked me for my dive card or to fill out any medical info in advance which is kind of a no-no. That aside they did at least have adequate medical stocks on both this support boat and eventual dive tender we were headed out to. The offshore marine preserve is the Similan Islands National Park and consists of a number of small-ish rocky/jungle islands about an hour and a half offshore. For a supposed marine preserve we saw a number of quite large cargo haulers passing between the islands and the mainland… you’d think they could stay outside the islands easily enough since I doubt anything that size was beelining for Phuket.

Eventually we saw the islands appear out of the morning haze… rocky domes topped with bright green trees surrounded by absolutely crystal clear turquoise waters and wish already visibly swarming the boat even before we docked with the actual dive tender called Stingray. We all bundled aboard with our gear (I’d only brought mask and fins and booties but some folks had full gear) and trundled upstairs to the observation deck where there was more fruit and cookies laid out. If you’re on a dive boat worth it’s salt you know you’re going to eat well. Unfortunately (and inexplicably for a hobby so reliant on lungs) the boat was full of Germans and fully half of them decided to light up a cigarette. So gross. I plonked myself down close to one of the railings despite the hot sun and tried to avoid the clouds. The various staff members unloaded the tender with whatever extra gear they’d brought from shore and lunch fixings etc then group by group we were called down for dive briefings and gear setup. I’d previously dived in relatively nearby waters on my previous Thailand trip (around Koh Lanta) so the fish forecast was about what I expected but I remained nervous as my dive leader guesstimated my required weights. I did at least get the lovely knowledge that these days a large wetsuit more than adequately fits me so no more trying to squeeze my shoulders into the largest ones they happen to have on the boat.

Once briefed our group loaded on to a zodiac and scooched a bit further up the coast before back rolling in at the head of a reef. Piotr was a nice guy but a bit of a high needs diver and went back and forth on whether he wanted Caro to take his camera in for him (he hadn’t adequately prepped his gopro for the situation however he did eventually get some nice shots.) He was also not great as a dive buddy as he had a tendency to swim off in random directions to shoot something with his camera and I’d turn around and he’d be heading the opposite direction of the gentle drift dive we were supposed to do along the drop. I was still fighting with my buoyancy a bit… this was definitely a bit too much weight but I counteracted it with a bit of extra air. Overall my consumption was decent but with the combination of trying to keep tabs on Piotr and the drift Caro had gotten a bit ahead by the time I was reaching the ‘time to signal her we should start ascending’ mark and I think Piotr was past it. This would have been fine if she’d turned around and asked for our current air despite the distance (visibility was phenomenal) but she didn’t for a very long stretch until I finally got close enough to tug one of her fins and signal. When we got above water and before the second dive she scolded us for not letting her know sooner but honestly… it was on her and to a lesser extent Piotr. I wasn’t in any danger as I was keeping tabs on my air and would have surfaced myself if I’d had to but she acted like we hadn’t been watching at all. Unfortunately getting back into the zodiac was really bad for me as though my leg hadn’t been hurting me too much for every day mobility… it was very much not a fan of lifting me+steel tank and gear+plus weight belt+however many pounds of absorbed water I had and I struggled up the ladder on that leg.

Once above water we got a delicious curry lunch and a bit of a break in the sunshine as the Stingray transferred over to one of the other islands. I know I’ve mentioned it before but a post dive hunger attack is like the post-swim snackies magnified by at least 4. I probably ate more curry than I did any other meal that trip and despite the super tiny galley on that boat this was some top tier green curry, spring rolls and some honey spiced chicken and rice as well. After lunch the smoking started again but thankfully because of the spot I’d chosen and the headwind it didn’t bother me as much. Piotr and I had a chat and I learned that he was older than he seemed and ran a recycling company back in Poland, he insisted on showing me some gnarly photos of his surgery after a motorcycle accident when his leg was reconstructed but I managed to get him to agree to send me the photos from his camera for these dives.

Dive #2 was in a gorgeous little group of rocks just offshore from another of the Similan islands, below the surface was a solid boulder garden that reminded me of some of my snorkeling spots in Fiji. Definitely some varied terrain but Caro had warned us that the current could surge here and she might be adjusting our path depending on it (and I’d privately warned Piotr to keep a closer eye on her so I didn’t have to try and bridge a gap between them again, thankfully his camera was low on power so he was a bit more restrained in what he chased after this dive.) Sure enough as we crested one area we got hit with a surge that more or less brought us to a standstill. Caro motioned us to squeeze between a gap in a giant bisected boulder and sure enough the surge lessened the moment we crossed the threshold. Annoyingly the girls had gotten to do the swim through below but I’d gotten tarred with Piotr’s brush and she had forbidden us to do it despite the fact that it was very open and I’d done way tighter swim-throughs previously.

We saw a number of lovely schools of fish on both these dives, trumpetfish, parrotfish, some wrasses, numerous lion/stonefish various kinds of blowfish, a ton of nudibranchs… but towards the end of the trip we ran into an old friend from my Fiji snorkeling… a Banded Sea Krait a very venomous (but not aggressive) sea snake that Piotr insisted on going to get a good shot of. I can’t say I blame him as they move in such an interesting way but it was as we tried to stay still in the current that my weight belt decided to break. I thought at first that the snap had come loose but as I very carefully stayed horizontal to keep it in place and signaled Caro for help I could tell that the other end of the buckle had simply pulled off the webbing. Unfortunately, when you’re sitting there in your BCD it’s not exactly easy to get the angle on it to see anything without taking it off, at which point you risk dropping some/all of the weights and completely pooching your buoyancy. Eventually she managed to get it secured temporarily and we surfaced where I again got yelled at for not managing my air despite the fact that no… I had… I’d shown her that I was at 70 (the ‘it’s time to go up’ pressure) at the appropriate time it just happened to be while she was fighting with my weight belt and presumably she forgot. I also surfaced with more left in my tank than one of the girls so I’m not sure why I got singled out given I was the one dealing with a minor emergency caused by their equipment. Side Note: I was not super surprised to discover the next day that she’d only been a dive instructor for a couple months at that point when she revealed that fact to the girls as we were enjoying the ride back in. She was nice and a good diver but I think needs a bit more seasoning.

I was definitely ready for a break after that so I was glad I didn’t have a night dive overnight planned like I’d originally considered. I fired up some tunes as we transferred to the tender as it was noisy enough conversation wasn’t really possible, not that that mattered as most of the passengers dozed off within 10 minutes of leaving the Similans and starting the transfer to shore. I wasn’t quite at that tired state yet so I watched the waves fly by and waved back at the fishermen heading out for an evening’s catch (likely squid fishing I think based on last time in this area.) Thankfully the arrival back at the pier wasn’t quite the same level of simultaneous action and we managed to get up and out and assigned back to minibuses relatively quickly. Hilariously at this point no one had asked me for money or even a credit card as a guarantee and I wondered what they would do if I checked out of my hotel tonight and didn’t return for day two as all they had was my email address and a passport number they’d never verified. Once back on board our bus Sarah (one of my new German dive buddies) and I quickly discovered that the routes indeed seemed to be prioritized by how fancy your hotel was as our driver drove past both of our places twice to hit more outlying resorts for the boomer couples in our car before doubling back to hit her tiny hostel and my smallish guesthouse. This was confirmed the next day when the driver went even more out of his way. Back at “The Mouth” I said hi to my new pup friends before getting an escort to my new bungalow, more or less a twin of the first one but with a worse view. Thankfully all my stuff was waiting and the shower was just as good as that was all I cared about at that moment. I spent a solid 20 minutes cleaning salt and generally rejuvenating then went out on my balcony and read my book as the sun slowly sank down over the ocean (though I could only see the treeline ? .) Honestly I was pretty pooped though and succumbed to the lure of the bed for an hour of semi-dozing watching a tv show before forcing myself up and out to dinner.

The lady at the front desk had recommended a place on the same sidestreet as we were located but their prices seemed a bit high so I decided to do a quick reconnoiter up on the main drag first. In doing so though I walked past the local place (called the Happy Snapper) and found a pretty pleasant garden atmosphere with open air tables and a little combo playing cover songs. I followed through and had a quick look at the main drag but nothing within a ten minute walk really looked or sounded great so I turned around and grabbed a table under a palm tree and ordered a curry and a cider.   The curry wasn’t bad (though they charged extra for rice :p) the cider was wet and delicious and the band was fun so it turned out to be probably the perfect laid back/enjoyable evening I needed. I ended up staying for the rest of the band’s set, tossed them a fiver and was asleep probably fifteen minutes later in prep for another early morning the next day.

Thankfully the next day was a bit less hectic all around… I got up a bit later, had time to actually sit down and eat some pineapple and drink some juice rather than just grabbing bananas to go. Also got to give Coffee and Latte a thorough cuddle which was nice as I was really missing my girls back home. Once back at the dock I was finally asked to pay and we eventually repeated the trip out to the islands… though with only about half the passengers we’d had the day before. The same two girls were with Caro (Sarah and another) and I had a new partner named Axel who was a very large man in width and height. Otherwise the routine was the same other than us hopping off the tender instead of the zodiac or big boat this time. I was less of a fan of that as it’s not set up with a big rear deck with space for putting on fins etc so there’s some awkward squeezing about. Axel had apparently paid for an extra large tank but was either otherwise inexperienced or otherwise rusty and actually turned off my air while doing the buddy check which uh… thanks buddy? Once we were in the water he wasn’t a ton better as I ended up having the opposite problem I had with Piotr in that every time I turned to check on he’d be literally on top of me, or right under me or I’d actively have kicked him because he wasn’t watching where he was going. He also burned through that giant air tank pretty quickly and we were back above the surface in under 30 minutes. To my frustration Caro scolded us about air use again even though I’d finished with the most air left of anyone other than her. Apparently Axel had gotten a bit excited with his camera as we saw another krait and I guess his desire to take photos had clashed with a fear of snakes and he churned through some air…

We had a longer trip between dive sites this time at the lunch break which was handy because lunch included some of the best deep friend chicken wings I’ve ever had (again despite a tiny boat galley) and I pounded back a few more than I should have. The girls and I chatted and enjoyed the sun and breeze and Caro came and sat with us for a bit as well. Eventually Axel showed up as well, revealed himself to be a dentist and asked about my leg and said he thought I should get it checked by a doctor just in case for infection. To be honest I was already leaning this direction but hadn’t wanted to be warned off diving so I’d delayed a bit. This wouldn’t be an issue after today at least and I’d spotted an ‘international clinic’ near-ish to my hotel.

Thankfully Axel’s air use was more under control for the second dive but he continued to constantly be right up in my business. My annoyance factor for this skyrocketed as, perhaps feeling (correctly) like she hadn’t been checking enough the day before Caro kept turning around… but always right after I’d had to dodge the guy… so I was either too high, or using my arms to backpedal (when diving properly your arms should basically be motionless unless you’re using a camera or a light or something) and she’d make a motion to me to level out or get down to her level etc etc etc… basically always something that wasn’t going to be an issue had she turned around 30 seconds before  but I’d had to dodge because Axel had come close to kicking out my regulator or whatever. It was incredibly frustrating since otherwise I felt like I was fully back in my diving groove and indeed when we got back to the boat I had fully 30BAR left and wasn’t particularly far behind her for air usage. Axel was a nice guy but I honestly needed to say something after and I waited til he was upstairs and said ‘for the record, every time you were scolding me for being too high it was cause I’d just dodged Axel’ and thankfully the other German girl said ‘yes I saw him kick you in the face at least twice.’

Highlights for day two were the second krait, a number of anemone fish of black and orange nemo cousin types, humungous schools of smaller glassfish with a few larger shoals of things like Angelfish, surgeon fish, various snappers and trevally and ooooh barracuda! (and many more) I also briefly saw an octopus but he jetted away before I could point him out to camera boy sadly. Annoyances aside, this was a gorgeous place to dive. The water was perfect, despite the offshore location current and surge were never too huge a problem and visibility was absolutely phenomenal as you can see from the photos. I gather as monsoon season arrives the visibility can get much worse but my understanding is diving more or less stops here for a couple months after the end of February which is no doubt good for the health of the park as well. I definitely plan to go back and do a liveaboard between these and the more northern/remote Sulin Island group at some point in my life. I still think they’re kind of overpriced but my Australia liveaboard remains a top 3 experience of my life so I’ll do it someday. This trip also reminded me that I really should get around to getting a dive computer.

Riding back in an hour later we logged our dives and chatted a bit about our fave dive sites. Sarah made us all jealous about her future dive plans for her current trip (I gather she was on a post school long term one like yours truly once did.) We’d also celebrated during the dive as that was her 50th trip down which made me realize I really need to consolidate my various books into the PADI app and figure out how many I’ve done now. Axel reiterated that I should hit the doctor and I assured him that I would.

A circuitous trip back to the mouth later I stopped at the front and asked if they recommended any particular clinic or if the close one was fine. Unfortunately for once language barriers were an issue but I eventually ended up on the phone with the close one and they said ‘we have no one right now if you want to come’ I told her I’d have a shower first but apparently I missed the aspect (or more likely she’d told the guy who didn’t have the best English) that they’d send a car. Instead I walked twenty minutes which was peanuts compared to what I’d been walking lately but somewhat exasperated the nurse who I’d talked to on the phone when I arrived. The clinic itself was brand new looking and spotless and I was quickly checked in, had my vitals taken and all the usual urgent care jazz. At this point I still had a deep gash which I’d been washing and cleaning daily with a local betadine clone and covering with a waterproof bandage for diving, a couple mostly healed scabby scrapes and a giant bruise and various associated bruised areas. There was also just generalized pain associated with standing in certain poses or after sitting for a while but I was fairly certain that was just the large welt straining the existing skin. The nursing staff were super great, I was less impressed with the doctor whose initial exam was basically ‘yeah that leg looks much larger than the other one’ (yeah, thanks chief) as he sent me in for an x-ray. I explained that I’d probably walked 50+ kilometers on it at this point so I doubted it was a full break if anything but I was all for an x-ray to make sure. I was less in favour of zero lead covering for my other areas while they did the x-rays but at least it wasn’t a chest film. At first glance as the x-ray came up I could tell there was no major break but waited for news on hairline issues as they sent me back to the “ER” exam room.

The nursing staff spent the intervening time doing a deep re-clean of the wound, commenting that I’d done a good job but they wanted to be sure all the debris was out. No complaints here and they had me all cleaned and meticulously bandaged by the time the doc came back in and confirmed there was no break but that ‘my bones are very big’ to which I just replied ‘I used to be much heavier.’ Armed with some new higher dose antibiotic ointment, seven days worth of oral horse pills to combat possible infection and a hefty bill for about $350 Canadian I took advantage of their car service this time and got dropped off down at the night market… that it turned out didn’t run this particular night… alas. Thankfully I realized I was actually near Sarah’s hostel and had seen a small Burmese place there so managed to get a big bowl of Burmese curry noodle soup to finally chase the last of the diving hungries away. Absolutely delicious thick and filling with a golden mango shake on the side. I couldn’t resist stopping at the happy snapper on the way back for one drink but the band called it quits earlier than night so that was all it was.

Unusually for me this had been basically the only part of the trip I’d done seat of my pants (though I’d only booked THE MOUTH right before the trip) I had nothing planned for the last few days of the trip and actually decided I’d be up for another day or two in Khao Lak rather than back in Bangkok and I’d maybe do a tour of the land based park. Unfortunately because it was a Friday night and this area is actually a place that some more local folks (both Thai and nearby countries) spend a long weekend I was out of luck for anything that wasn’t $250 a night. In retrospect I should have done one more night in the islands, one more night in Khao Lak and just returned to Bangkok the morning before I left but oh well… hindsight. It just happens that this trip was at absolute peak season of a busy year so I couldn’t be as flexible as I sometimes am on these trips.

With some difficulty I booked myself on a flight back to Bangkok the next night and headed to bed.

Since my flight wasn’t until 9pm I left my bags in the hotel lobby and hiked down towards the nearest of the villages where I’d been the night before. While I’d seen the boat sitting near Sarah’s hostel and the Burmese place I hadn’t had a good look so I walked over and confirmed that yes… this was the Thai police patrol boat that washed this far inland during the Boxing Day tsunami of 2004. I wrote a whole mess of words about the tsunami when visiting Phuket on my last trip here so I won’t go back over everything but you can definitely see how wrecked this area must have been. Given it’s a series of narrow beach plains on a relatively unprotected coast it’s not really surprising. Given I didn’t have the time on land to explore the whole area I didn’t see any of the other monuments but there are apparently a number of them scattered around the ‘khao lak’ area. After marveling at the boat (it honestly looks as if it was purposely moved there) I walked through the village of Bang Niang down to the beach. There are definitely signs on the beach that this was once a bit more developed. The road down to the beach ends in a number of giant jagged blocks of concrete as though there was once a pier there, the sand trip is narrow despite the wide bay and feels like it was probably once much more plentiful and a few of places closest to the beach either feel underdeveloped or recently/haphazardly repaired. This too is probably where some of these new larger resorts came from though I suppose it’s also likely that this area being farther from Phuket has been lagging slightly behind on the recovery as tourism gets back to record levels around here.

I sat on the beach quite a while and enjoyed my last gasp of ocean for this trip. I think if I return to Khao Lak I’ll probably do the liveaboard thing ending here then spring for a fancier oceanfront hotel for a couple days just to savour the view. Spending 200+ a night when I’m spending the entire day out diving (for another couple hundred) has never seemed like a particular good use of money though. It was a HOT day though, I think 38 with the humidex and I decided to indulge and let myself have a coke and a sit under a fan. This little town was just as German focused as the rest of the area with every second shop having a sprechen sie Deutsch sign up. I couldn’t resist posting up at a cute open air café at the intersection of two roads and ordering their special schnitzel (yes again!) and a large coke to refuel. While it wasn’t in the same tier as the one at chinchilla it was absolutely delicious and made for some great people watching for an hour or so. I’d actually hoped to pick up some form of khao lak diving tee shirt but I never actually saw the physical location for my shop and none of the other shops seemed to have merch. Even the general market stalls only had the same generic mass produced thai beer company tees you see everywhere here. I remember when I dove on Koh Tau there were definitely large amounts of diving related apparel on offer. Sadly while exploring I also discovered there was a beer festival planned with what looked like a ton of extra food carts and bands, unfortunately it wasn’t kicking off until later that evening. In the end I just wandered around the town a bit longer before grabbing a gelato.

Walking around Khao Lak was another reminder of the schizophrenic thai take on cleanliness and respect for property. Garbage tends to pile up a lot here. I’m not sure if that’s a lack of people in the jobs to take it away (this seemed likely on Pha Ngan) or just lack of infrastructure. Given the tropical climate this can sometimes be unpleasant but I also know it’s not a HUGE problem like it can be some places. The scourge that is plastic bottles is definitely a big problem and I’d frequently see locals just tossing them out of their car windows. Yet at the same time many things are spotless and most public areas are well groomed. We’ve talked previously about the less than plentiful respect Thai folks have for leaving the sidewalk passable for pedestrians and that was certainly the case here as well. Yet at the same time I’ve seen multiple times on this trip a business just wrapped in chicken wire or a tarp to keep out the most casual of walk by theft and nothing more. Likewise while walking khao lak I saw a few public laundromats that are literally just shiny new machines under the barest of protections from the rain, often down a dark alley… can’t help but think of how that would be stripped in Winnipeg within an hour.

After hiking back to my digs I discovered a bigger problem… finding a cab to the airport was a bit of a problem. I’d mentioned to the lady on the morning crew that I wanted one but hadn’t given her a firm time and it seems as if no one was in the mood to drive to Phuket that evening (perhaps they were all going to the beer festival) but in retrospect given it was Friday I was probably running into the issue that most of the cabs who did that run had already driven in to catch incoming rides. In the end my lady at The Mouth found me one for $50ish and I headed in to town. It was just as well that I’d planned to go early as traffic was pretty wild at a few chokes points and it took fully 1h45 to get back vs. the 1h15 I’d been expecting. That said, as I got to the airport and checked in I had some good news. I’d purposely booked the late flight as it was significantly cheaper than the one leaving 2 hours earlier (roughly 2/3 the cost) but when I checked in about 2.5 hours early the attendant said ‘We can put you on the earlier flight if you want.’ Heck ya! This got me into Bangkok early enough to not have to go straight to bed, though to be honest it didn’t take me long to find myself there anyway.


I’d sprung for a hotel in a different neighbourhood of Bangkok from my usual haunts. I figured it would force me to explore some new areas and check out a new neighbourhood. Unfortunately it was a bit of a dud. The immediate locale was not particular exciting after dark except for one alley which is the new hive of go go bars and questionable goings on for tourists. The hotel itself was actually less pleasant than my cheaper place over near Khao San and had a dank mildewy smell every time I returned to the room until the AC had run about ten minutes, alas I should have just booked myself at one of the old standby chain and I could have had a nice soak in the pool to end my day. However, it was SUPER convenient to the subway so I ended up just shuttling all over the city from there for relative peanuts (most rides were $1-2.)

Since it was the weekend I ended up spending the next day at the Chatuchak Weekend Market which is an absolutely enormous flea market near the train station. The variety of goods available is truly bonkers though it’s thankfully semi organized into rough categories as otherwise the chaos of the tightly packed stalls would make it unnavigable. One end of the market is dedicated to art with everything from single artists in tiny stalls to small climate controlled rooms with fancier displays. I actually saw a few things I really loved but everything trended towards enormous canvasses which… even taking advantage of the shipping companies helpfully nearby with tubes and postage would not likely have fit anywhere in my house. Definitely more focused on the McMansion crowd with their giant 2 story vestibules. There are large sections for clothes and as I’d hoped I found some very cool shirts that were designs by local artists in amongst the beer tee stalls. In between are large swaths of stalls dedicated to home décor, kitchenware, used clothes (honestly few deals to be had here I was kind of surprised), pet supplies, plants and fake plants as well as books/antiques/handicrafts at one end. The crowd is an odd mix of locals and tourists, particularly in the long canyons of the inner stalls.

I knew I was somewhat pushing my luck on my suitcase weight already once everything was loaded back in both in terms of space and weight so I tried not to go crazy but I did pick up a couple of the aforementioned tees and some Chinese style soup spoons along with a few other small treats between this and later market visits. It was an absolutely stifling day again with the smokey haze that always makes it worse in Bangkok. Eventually I gave in to the lure of various great smells and scouted out for some food. Very enthusiastic google reviews and a packed house led me to a stall selling ‘boat noodles’ which was a hole in the wall with a simple menu of ‘we have it til we don’t’ noodles. I ended up getting fat rice noodles and braised pork in a peppery savoury broth that was probably top 3 for my meals in Thailand this trip. Super weird recommendation to make to someone but yeah… boat noodle stall in the middle of the weekend market in Bangkok, top tier noodles!  It was hot enough that after wandering a while after lunch it was time to find some shade so I hopped back on the subway and wandered around the district near my hotel again, still not super exciting but a little bit cooler.

Later that night I decided to check out the Chinatown weekend night market which I’d never been to before. It was again thankfully a quick subway ride but I wasn’t expecting just how busy it would be, mostly because they don’t actually shut down the road in question they just slightly widen the sidewalks with metal barriers.

I’m not sure if the level of decoration was normal or it was just the fact that we were only a week and a half after lunar new year at this point. It was a bit of a different vibe than most of the night market’s I’d attended this trip but the food was phenomenal. I started with some great greasy noodles with pork and egg, later found some shrimp dumplings that were delicious if rather heavy on the msg… then finished with an amazing BBQ pork bao. Also gave in to a craving for ice cream in the form of this marshmallow wrapped then toasted ice cream bar that was incredibly messy but tasty. It was definitely an adventurous day culinarily.

The next morning (my last day) I decided to meander across the city with the vague idea of checking out some of the parks and seeing a new neighbourhood or two. Lumphini park was described to me as the “Central Park” of Bangkok. I don’t know if I’d go that far but it was indeed an expansive green space in the midst of the city core. I’d picked up a cinnamon croissant from a bizarre little food stall market under the freeway and walked past the US Embassy (flicking a quick double bird at captain Tariff) before making my way through the gates. I ate my croissant watching a monitor lizard sunning itself until some dumb girl got too close and scared it back into the water. Thankfully it turned out the park is more or less overrun with monitors and I saw a number of other ones sunning or swimming away from the main path. Very neat to see as a prairie boy though I know in parts of Thailand they’re super common. The park itself is a pleasant green oasis that unfortunately seemed to be undergoing a bunch of maintenance at this particular moment. There were a number of public art installations (frequently friendship donations from other nations) and ponds and lakes. I’m not sure how the monitors feel about the swan paddleboats but I imagine they mostly stick to the areas people aren’t blundering.

Wandering the rest of the day wasn’t super eventful. I mostly people watched and tried to dodge roadworks. One long avenue I had to walk down a public works team had opened all the sewer grates for about 4 blocks but left no warning barriers up so you were one stumble away from going headfirst into an inky horror. I eventually ended up back down in Chinatown and picked up a few more small gifts from a stall I’d seen my first visit. My other goals was (again) food related and I tried out a back alley curry bar that was recommended in my old guide book and a website I’d found. It’s basically a random Chinatown alley but they have signs up pointing you in the right direction. Two large serving carts with vats of curry boiling away. You choose which curry, you get a bowl, you pay extra if you want some Chinese sausage added… then you pull up a tiny red plastic stool in an alley filled with shophouses and you devour a delicious meal for sub $2. Again this was worth the special trip and something I’d seek out again.

Sadly it was time to head back to Canada quite early the next morning so I ended my last day with a trip to a Michelin starred restaurant near my hotel doing classic Thai I treated myself to a phenomenal lemongrass, lychee and rum cocktail… some shrimp cakes and a delicious curry… and probably spent as much as I’d spent on the previous 10 Thai meals that trip. Was it good? Yes. Was it worth that much more? Definitely not. I’d visit again though, ideally with someone else to sample a few more things… but I pity the people that come to Thailand and only eat in this sort of place.

As I walked back to my hotel, dodging yet another hooker trying to grab my wrist as I passed cowboy alley I caught myself thinking about how great this trip had been. I know it’s been obvious in this travelogue but food is a huge part of what I love about coming here and this trip had demolished even the massive expectations that had been set by the previous trip. I managed to both see my old faves and make some new discoveries. Some I’d repeat, some I wouldn’t. I had regrets about not doing a couple things but they’re relatively minor and will just go on the list for next time because there’s little doubt I’ll be back in Thailand before long. Honestly I’m surprised it took me this long to be back. I suspect next time I may try a different time of year and make a stronger attempt to just completely avoid Bangkok except as airports require it (I wish flying in to Chiang Mai direct didn’t add so much to the cost.) Despite that, I think I enjoyed Bangkok more this time than last. It’s a great city but I definitely enjoy exploring the rest of the country more. Next trip it’s definitely time to hit the east/northeast of the country and to do more diving (maybe bookend the trip with it next time.) In general it’s probably time to push out of my comfort zone a bit more next trip and I’ll probably try to add Laos on to my trip and possibly another side trip (I think I’m bumping up and doing four weeks next time if I can.)

Thankfully the flight back home was faster and my bet on booking an aisle seat in one of the shorter rows at the back of the plane with an empty middle seat next to me paid off and it stayed empty for the long leg. Making up for my ukranian friend last year by having an empty seat next me for both of the trans-pacific flights this time! Of course… I returned home to find we were in the midst of a nasty cold snap and instead of at least a slight improvement I got again and 70ish degree C temperature flip… alas.

The highlights this trip were definitely the food, the elephants and the diving unsurprisingly… the low points were definitely the complications in travelling to/from Pai even if I mostly enjoyed my time there. Lessons learned? 1. Pre-book Pai travel in advance 2. It’s probably time to get some better earplugs for sleeping. 3. Find a woman who dives/friend who dives who actually travels so I don’t have to play dive buddy roulette.

Overall recommendations for someone thinking of going?

-Thailand is a beautiful country and honestly kind of ‘Asia on easy mode’ for English speakers especially with modern smartphones. Just be willing to get out of your comfort zone a bit and you’ll have a much better time. Don’t be the American woman with her tunafish.

-Plan for some time to adjust to the heat, it’s definitely a brick wall when you first arrive.

-Don’t cram your schedule too tight but also make sure you get outside Bangkok.

As always I’m happy to discuss any of my trips further or give you some pointers if you’re interested in going. It’s a very solo traveller friendly country even if you’re a bit older than the backpacker crews those words bring to mind.

Stay tuned for one post featuring some photos I missed early…

Gulf Island Getaway

As we left off last time it was unacceptable o’clock in the morning and I’d just risen early after struggling to get any sleep in order to catch my ride south back to Chiang Mai for a noon-ish flight south to the islands. It was still black as midnight as I trundled my bags down the deserted street to the tiny counter and parking lot that served as the ‘bus’ depot for Pai. Local dogs were everywhere by the sides of the road that morning but they are thankfully road savvy and got out of the way as we started to move. By the time I finally left town dawn was breaking very slowly and the light started to fight through the mist here and there as we hugged the top of the valley back to the pass.  This quickly became rather breathtaking as we rose completely above the mist and the sun got brighter. I wish we could have stopped to get a better photo but I contented myself taking in the view. Sadly with this driver being just as (if not more) aggressive on the curves there was little chance of catching up on any sleep anyway. We thankfully made it back to Chiang Mai on time as this time I managed to get a cab driver who somehow had never been to the airport before, got on the freeway and subsequently missed exits at least 3 times and took us on a farmland tour before I got out my phone and started turn by turn directing him to the airport. I was a very happy camper once I was finally checked in to my flight and able to get through security and sit down.

As I waited in the boarding lounge I came to two realizations. One, I’d made a rookie mistake and forgotten to take my hoodie out of the big bag and was thus facing glacial thai public transport AC without a coverup. Two… I’d not stopped for anything to eat and as per usual for thai airports all the food in here made a north American airport markup look cheap. I decided to wait for my Bangkok layover in hopes of something more appetizing for actual food and just demolished a bag of chips I still had in my backpack as I sat shivering. Thankfully once I was on my flight despite it being all of an hour I discovered that I actually got a small meal of shrimp Pad see-euw and yogurt which was all the refuel I needed. Just as well as the wing of the airport I ended up in in Bangkok only had vending machines and the AC was turned even higher in this smaller out of the way lounge. I was flying from Bangkok to Koh Samui in the Gulf of Thailand so I was again on a smaller flight. After 4+ hours of shivering it was glorious to get out on the tarmac at Koh Samui and take an open air transport to the tiny terminal as I breathed in moist sea air. Samui is a hilariously small airport for how busy a tourist destination it has become, basically none of it is truly ‘indoors.’ Unfortunately as expected this was also the end of cheap convenient taxis/rideshares and back to the Taxi Mafias of the southern resort areas. The airport is tucked away in a maze of side streets and it’s a bit of a walk to get to anywhere that’s a public street. Apparently grab (uber equivalent) used to work reasonably well except for at the airport but there have been fights and confrontations and the taxi mafia is back controlling everything. Much like Phuket I gather the government makes a token crackdown every so often then things return to the status quo once their attention is elsewhere. It’s the one downside of visiting these areas as you go from Bangkok or Chiang Mai where you can cross half the city for $5 to my sub 5km trip from the airport to my one night hotel for almost $20. Once you’re out of the airport you do have the option of taking the pickup truck ‘busses’ previously described but even those will try to gouge you as a visitor and you have to negotiate to get a price that again would get you 5x the distance directly to your destination in other Thai locales.

My final destination was actually Koh Pha Ngan the next island north in the chain but try as I might I hadn’t been able to find a Chiang Mai to Samui flight that got me there in time to catch the last ferry of the day. A friend had warned me this would likely be a problem unless I caught the direct flight but as that was $600 instead of $150 I decided to spend a night on Samui. Samui actually seems quite nice, I know people including my parents who have spent some lovely time there but I was looking to get to a slightly more relaxed vibe, do some gentle snorkeling/beach relaxing. Last time I was in Thailand I’d gone straight even further north to Koh Tao as that’s the diving center for the area but I’d made a strategic decision to move my diving later to a more expensive but supposedly great area on the Andaman coast. My hotel for this night was chosen for proximity to the ferry terminal while still being not bargain basement. Unfortunately I’d gotten the last room and it turned out to be the one facing a very busy beachfront street with a large patio window, the seal on the both the inner and patio doors was shot and I could here conversations in the room across the hall as well… definitely not a hotel going on my recommended list despite their location. Luckily by the time I grabbed a quick dinner and a few necessities I was so wrecked from the long day and lack of sleep the night before that I passed out the moment my earplugs were in.

Morning rolled around and I’d chosen to take the second ferry of the day so I didn’t have to race anywhere first thing which turned out to be a great decision as despite what was lacking about the room this little hotel did indeed have a great location right on the fisherman’s beach. Lovely powdery white sand stretched east and west of me in a gentle bay down to large vacation homes in one direction and a giant golden buddha in the other which I knew was appropriately called ‘Big Buddha Beach.’ As check in time wasn’t until noon I grabbed my sunglass, found a beach lounger and spent a couple hours just enjoying the peaceful morning breeze with my book and a bottle of pineapple juice. Eventually it was time to be on my way to the ferry pier and I was feeling pretty recharged. My inherent cheapness meant I was walking there with my suitcase though as I was quoted 15 bucks to go what I knew was only about 1.5km, I probably could have hopped a songthaew but by the time I actually saw one I’d made it halfway. In a normal city this wouldn’t have been a big deal but as I believe I’ve previously described the Thai people have zero restraint in completely blocking sidewalks with vehicles, merchandise, decapitating ropes and cables or just leaving unfinished unmarked roadworks. I will probably need to do some maintenance on my poor suitcases roller wheels once back home. Thankfully the ferry port itself had a bunch of shaded seating, I checked in no problem and was offered a minibus to my hotel at the other side for sub $10 which I figured was an acceptable deal (and turned out to be about half of what I’d pay to get back later.) The ferry itself was a bit of a gong show though. I gather this pier only serves their Samui to Pha Ngan route and they had 3 ferries tied up at the pier. I do not understand why but they tie the one active boat up on the outside of the three all moored together while the other side of the pier is unused. They then proceed to load all passengers and their luggage through the other two ferries (one of which clearly hasn’t sailed in ages) to board the last one. I’m guessing the second boat is only used around the time of the full moon parties on Pha Ngan (which I am purposely avoiding) where an extra 10 thousand or so young people tend to converge on one beach on Pha Ngan. Thankfully the sailing itself was uneventful and I got to my new digs in time to check in to a delightfully isolated and quiet bungalow just off the beach, change into my swim trunks, catch happy hour at the beach bar and have a relaxing swim in the absolutely bathwater warm waves.

The resort itself was about a 10 minute walk from the main road (down some very dark under repair roads) and was one of a series of smallish beach resorts of varying levels of fancy. Mine had approximately 12 small beach bungalows, each with shady palms, a small terrace and sand paths to the beach. They had a small pool which I never used that seemed nice enough for days where the sea was too wild and a small restaurant that was ‘ok’ with reasonably priced drinks and decent coffee according to some germans I chatted with. To be honest, it was perfect. It definitely wasn’t the prettiest beach on the island but it was calm and after the fairly hectic pace of the first half of the trip this stretch of days was all about relaxation anyway. I didn’t move the rest of the day, alternating my book with a couple swims, an order of so-so pad thai from the kitchen and a couple more drinks as I watched sun set over the gulf of Thailand. The only thing that interrupted the peace was something Cicada like that came out for an hour or so after sunset and droned loudly for a bit. I closed down the bar that night and after looking at the stars for a while curled up in the comfiest bed of the trip so far and watched a movie, perfectly content.

I’m not going to lie, with a quiet comfy bed (and no roosters in earshot) for the first time in a bit I let myself sleep in a bit that first day and by the time I emerged, had a morning swim and a long hot shower it was probably pushing lunchtime. I think the most energetic non-swimming thing I did the rest of the day was go for a walk to replace my bandages for my wounded leg and grab a quick lunch. I spent most of the day alternating between swimming, reading and dozing in a hammock in the shade. There was a kiteboarding school just down the beach from my digs and it was fun watching the newbies trying as, from my limited experience with the thing, it seemed like the wind was just strong enough for it to be possible, while also making it really hard to get lift. All in all it was exactly the recharge day I needed and I’d also found my hotel did laundry for a rate no worse than anywhere I’d seen on the main road.

The next morning was absolute gorgeous, the waves had picked up a bit overnight and the gentle crashing was just loud enough to reach my room as I lazily greeted the day. I decided to be a little more energetic but I wasn’t expecting to do quite as much as I ended up doing. The interior of Koh Pha Ngan is fairly rugged and on the west of the island it’s a fairly narrow strip of flat land on the coast before the hills quickly climb carpeted with jungle. I vaguely had it in my head that I’d go for a walk south along the beach, maybe as far as a place called ‘Monkey Corner’ that apparently had a colony of monkeys hanging out near the road. There was a fairly intense storm not long ago that caused some flooding and high waves here and while you couldn’t really tell by my hotel I began to see more signs as I walked south along the beach. A number of damaged boats, piles of battered fishing nets and floats rested near the beach along one of the stream outlets and a large amount of other debris sat along the surge height for quite a ways in either direction. This section I walked along had less in the way of tourism type infrastructure so probably hasn’t been a priority.

Overall Koh Pha Ngan feels much less touristy than Samui. There are still a ton of tourist focused businesses of course but the hotels tend to be smaller bungalow type operations (on this part of the island at least, I understand there are some larger resorts on the northeast corner) and it tends to be overall a bunch of small businesses vs. the kind of giant restaurants etc you see in Phuket. Eventually I reached a more rugged section of coast that precluded beach walking and turned to walk up to the main road. I’d worn my walking sandals due to the beach walking and if you know my terrible feet you know that doesn’t usually go well for me for long distance walking but I guess that’s another side benefit of the weight loss as I managed a ton of walking without any real ill effects other than mild soreness which was fantastic. It’s a good thing too as the road quickly turned into a couple hundred foot climb over a saddle pass into the next bay… then a second longer, steeper climb to actually reach the area of monkey corner. Monkey corner turned out to be pretty low key, genuinely just a small section of road on the point with a small monkey colony hanging out near the road and a bunch of signs not to feed them. They were adorable but not particularly active. One imagines that despite the sign they probably do quite well for handouts by staying near the road and looking cute.

By this point I’d walked halfway to the southern tip of the island and the area where the Full Moon Party takes place which was supposed to be quite pretty when it isn’t overrun with 10,000 drunks so I kept walking until the rising heat (roughly 35C that day) and the sun directly overhead made a lunch stop sound like a good idea. I was still fairly high up in the hill crossing so finding a place with a view didn’t take much work. As I was now in the south it was time to start enjoying some Massaman as it’s almost universally better the further south you go as it’s ‘muslim’ curry and the Thai muslim areas are closer to the border with Malaysia. The meal wasn’t bad… the view was better as the restaurant more or less overhung the cliff and looked down through jungle to the sparkling turquoise waters far below. I lingered longer than I’d originally planned with a nice fan blowing across my face and a mix of view and a good book.

I’d been able to see my ultimate destination from the restaurant as well and kept walking south passing an odd mix of abandoned (covid casualty?) sparsely sited hotels, a few guest houses that seemed more or less deserted and parking lots for various party nights other than the big shebang. While the big party on the beach is the night of the full moon or immediately adjacent the week surrounding it also tends to have large dance parties that run until dawn at other locations, some deep in the jungle, some on other stretches of beach and they often include internationally known DJs running the show. Getting a hotel on this part of the island at that time usually requires a minimum stay so not surprising there are other parties going after those dollars. I was here a solid week and a half before the big day though and things were much less crowded, especially further out from the Haad Rin beach itself. Things became much busier as I reached the actual beach area itself which I found surprisingly small after the various images I’d seen of it online during trip planning over the years. It’s a pretty little cove with lovely white sand that they must do an excellent job of cleaning after the parties. The waves were crashing harder on this side of the island and there was actually a red flag up for swimming that no one was paying attention to. It was in fact quite busy with swimmers and sunbathers I just cannot fathom it being packed with a rock concert’s worth of people… it sounds like my personal hell.

I’ve discussed this in travelogues before but man… why when you’re travelling is there always that one 80 year old dude on the beach. He’s in really good shape for his age and he knows it and he feels the need to just stand there at the front of the beach… always wearing a speedo… he was once well muscled but he’s quite old now it’s more like oiled sinew… he’s ALWAYS tanned so deeply and for so long that his skin has the texture of a really worn out Barcalounger which combined with his low bodyfat makes him honestly just look like some sort of beef jerky golem. He’ll always be in your gaze as you’re trying to quietly look out to sea…

I ended up spending the afternoon there enjoying the sand, walking in the waves a bit and generally just continuing the relaxation tour. I hadn’t yet decided if I was walking back or hopping a red truck but in the end I started walking back but when I paused for a drink of water at the base of the first hill some woman asked me if I needed a ride and mentioned some large sum of money. I laughed and shook my head and continued walking but a moment later she called out again and a young woman on her scooter had stopped and asked where I was going, I told her and she told me to hop on. I wasn’t going to say no but I will admit that wasn’t my favourite motorcycle ride ever as the rolling hills on her underpowered scooter made the uphill bits slow and the downhill bits feel like an exercise in trust in her brakes that I wasn’t sure I was on board with. When she dropped me back at my hotel corner I gladly offered her what I knew the red truck cost would have been and she turned me down with a smile and gave me a wai. I returned the gesture and said goodbye and felt great about the world for a few minutes. I was (unsurprisingly) pooped at this point as even with the ride I’d done about an 8km hike in +35 weather so I went for another swim and enjoyed another happy hour sunset off the west coast.

While randomly browsing google maps of my hotel area I’d noticed a German restaurant with 5star reviews just up the main road from my hotel. I’d already decided to have a break from Thai food for that night’s dinner and had initially been tempted by the Russian place listing pelmeni but given my less than charitable feelings towards Russia at the moment and the reviews for this Chinchilla Restaurant I decided to go for schnitzel. This was the correct choice. The restaurant itself was a narrow roadside stall with four or five tables that seemed to be run by a German dude and his Thai partner. I got a delicious slab of schnitzel, a green salad and a healthy portion of German potato salad for I think about twelve bucks all in. It was phenomenal and one of the best schnitzels I’ve had outside of my platonic ideal from Austria. Full of meat I eventually stumbled back to the hotel and lay reading in a hammock on the beach until my yawns overtook me and I headed to bed.

Sadly the next morning it was already time to leave the island. Unfortunately the night before I’d found out that my laundry hadn’t been finished and though I was told she’d get them to do it first thing I still had visions of having to pack a bunch of wet or dirty clothes but to my relief by the time I was ready to check out there was a washed and pressed pile of t-shirts and undies ready to go and tight enough that I could just quickly pound them into the bag and hop a cab. I had a flight to catch to Phuket in order to head up the Andaman coast and unfortunately the later ferry would have been cutting it pretty fine to the airport so I had to hop the morning one which again gave me time to kill on Samui. Thankfully the ferry terminal had cheap luggage storage so I just left the big bag there and took a walk past the big buddha and over to Choeng Mon beach where my parents had stayed on their interrupted by COVID voyage in 2020.

Choeng Mon was yet another flavour of beach for this trip, a combination of more families (I hadn’t really seen any younger kids on Pha Ngan) and more retiree age folks. The sand was lovely and there were a few more large and/or pricey resorts nearby interspersed with smaller beachfront places. It was a much more ‘mexico-like’ vibe with vendors coming by regularly and the various resorts jealously guarding their various stretches of beach. It was a beautiful spot but I definitely preferred the more laid back vibe I’d had. I again just spent a couple hours on the beach until rising hunger sent me back up to the main road to a place that had looked delicious where I snagged a curry and a beer before making my way back to the ferry then on to the airport.

Samui airport was even odder outbound however as after checking in  (and waiting to make sure they don’t flag your bag as needing inspection) you then have to hike a fair ways to another terminal ‘building’ to actually go through security and leave. I was fairly early so I actually stopped partway at a lounge that was basically a small garden strewn with beanbags where you could relax and watch planes landing/taking off. Unfortunately my flight luck ran out for this one and I was delayed over an hour and a half, never really got an explanation as to why but I felt bad given this was the one time this trip I’d pre-arranged an airport transfer as I was going to a smaller town about an hour to an hour and a half north of Phuket airport itself and I assumed the poor guy was stuck waiting for me. I’m not actually sure he was though or it was just a service, I tried to ask but neither he nor the people at my eventual destination spoke much English. It definitely gets the award as the wildest cab of the trip with quite the party/arabian nights atmosphere when I first got in then sparkling multicoloured stars once we were actually moving.

Khao Lak and a whole bunch of diving was next but I’ll leave that for the next and probably final post. I don’t expect it’ll take as long to get this one up, I’ve just been slammed since getting back to Canada.

Pai Go

Leaving Chiang Mai was less pleasant. I’d hit up the young woman at the front desk the day before to look into a ticket for me to Pai and she said something about reserving me one. This is partially on me, I didn’t realize they’d cut down on the number of minibuses going there and basically only one company was doing it. Unfortunately I didn’t find this out til the morning, when I returned from the cooking class the person on the desk told me there was no note from them. Come morning I asked and ‘no it’s full, maybe you go to station and ask’ (Yes well I would have done that yesterday or started researching alternatives if you’d left a note for me.)

To compound matters she sent me to the wrong station which was (just) within walking range with a suitcase so off I went just to find out that was only for full size buses and the route to Pai had been discontinued at some point. Hop in a grab to the other station, get there to find out all trips are full for the next couple days… ugh… ended up getting hopped on by a ‘private’ cab that charges 3x the price and doesn’t leave til they’re full but thankfully that only took an hour. Since it was basically that or abandon my reservation there and stay in Chiang Mai longer I went for it. To be honest I considered staying in Chiang Mai… or if I hadn’t booked a flight out of Chiang Mai to the islands maybe even just going somewhere else but since everything involved coming back to CM it seemed foolish (The CM-koh samui flight being the priciest in country flight I’d be doing.)

The road to Pai is known for featuring 172 nausea inducing curves as it travels up into the mountains and along a ridge line pass. To put the windy level into perspective it’s roughly a 3 hour trip to cross only 129km of highway distance. When you reach the pee/snack stop there are signs everywhere for motion sickness cures. Thankfully no one in our very packed minivan seemed to be feeling green though I noticed a few people had taken gravol in advance. There were definitely a few who looked very relieved that the journey was over

The road and the surroundings of Pai were stunning with sharp rising hills covered in an absolute carpet of greenery. It made me wonder how much greener it could get since I knew it was the dry season. One of these days I’ll have to come to Thailand in the rainy season and see some of these rivers and waterfalls at full force. The town of Pai… was less impressive. It’s basically become a backpacker mecca in the north and is the most reachable outpost on the Mae Hong Loop in the NW of the country. Even before Thailand legalized (sort of) weed it had a hippie commune rep. To be honest that was part of the reason I’d skipped it on my previous visit. My first impression of the town is that it seemed like Khao San Road in Miniature (KS Road being the backpacker strip in Bangkok that’s a combo cheap backpacker mecca/mini spring break atmosphere.) The poster child for the vibe here might have been the first guy I walked down the street behind. A tall bearded dude that could have been Indian Jesus smoking an enormous joint and wearing mirrored sunglasses and a velvet bathrobe that said ‘Maid of Honour.’

I had been mildly worried about this party central vibe and had booked a small guesthouse a bit off the main drag so I got my bearings and quickly set off. It was pretty clear that the main hive of activity was along this one street and in fact later in the evening it’s a nightly walking street for a few hours. I passed a few tshirt stalls, more motorbike rental signs that I can count and a few restaurants that looked like possibilities. In true thai fashion the sidewalk was barely a suggestion and as I hit the edge of the main district it disappeared… conveniently enough I was walking past the area hospital at least. Down a side street I found Ban Aew Pai, a small garden guest house with 6 or 7 bungalows. It was a picturesque place that seemed like it would be far enough from the noise.

I’d reached the point in the trip where I was kind of aching for some non-thai food so once I’d settled in I took a walk back into the hustle and bustle to try to find food/make some plans. Armed with a hopefully still valid recommendation from my old Thailand lonely planet I set out past bar after bar and eventually reached Maya burger which served a really solid little quarter pound burg with good toppings and crispy fries paired with a delicious garlic mayo. It was definitely a product of the moment but also pretty delicious in its own right. I blame that feeling of contentment for the foolishness that occurred next.

I was honestly trying to do some rafting… unfortunately the only one day trip was done as a one day ‘back to chiang mai’ trip and basically would have been doing the same trip I’d done a few days previous but with my bags being taken along in a van. Honestly had I been aware of it I would have considered it. The only trip the other adventuring company had going out the following day was a trek into the jungle. Don’t get me wrong, I’d been thinking I’d do some hiking in Pai… and in my defence their listing for this trip was a bald faced lie… but still I was mental. I blame my brain for focusing on the ‘finishes at a waterfall’ part. I stayed out for a while people watching but after a couple of drinks I was ready to just retreat for the night given the impending early start.


The day started with a pickup in a Songthaew (pickup truck with two parallel benches in the back) and we immediately headed north further along the Mae Hong Son loop. I’m not a person given to motion sickness but if I’d thought the minibus ride the day before was bad sitting perpendicular to the driving direction in a vehicle with only the barest suggestion of shock absorbers was a new level. It turns out were were travelling a solid couple hours out to the start of the hike (something else I’d missed on the brochure.) Along for the ride were a young British couple and a Spanish woman a few years older than myself. We introduced ourselves and chatted a bit but as the drive progressed and the road got worse conversation became more difficult. The British contingent was definitely feeling the motion sickness by the time we finished and I was honestly keeping an eye on him getting ready to dodge if he lunged for the tailgate.

Arriving in a small village our guide welcomed us and we met the other two hikers with us: two Slovenian girls who were doing a two day hike and who’d overnight-ed in the village. They were very nice but set off the first warning bells when they mentioned they’d definitely hiked way longer than the brochure said the day before. I didn’t really get much time to process that before we were on our way, touring the village and seeing the old style homes where the livestock was penned under the stilted cottages/huts and dogs wagged their tales at us but mostly just stayed in the shade. It was an interesting glimpse of a very different way of life to ours but I laughed pretty hard at the one guy who shouted out to our guide in greeting and he responded with ‘I go trekking, you come?’ and the guy said something that was pretty clearly ‘hell no’ in Thai. With that settled we started heading up into the hills.

Most of the people reading this blog are also prairie people and have probably also experienced the harsh realization that, no matter how good of shape you’re in, your legs are gonna complain when you’re suddenly expecting your legs to do this ‘uphill crap.’ I actually held up pretty well for the first half of the hike and was having to slow down to wait for the Slovenian girls a few times. The first stage of the path was clearly a livestock path and we used ladders to get over fencing a few times and frequently had to dodge cow pats, then a bit later the cows themselves. The views backwards as we climbed up the valley were phenomenal, unfortunately the rest of the hike mostly avoided any great view points.

When we eventually reached the top of the first mountain ridge and took a rest and water break. We all marveled at our guide Jon doing this hike in what looked like dollar store foam flip flops but to be honest he probably could have done it barefoot. Once moving again Jon pointed into a valley a few km away and pointed out his village. A few minutes later he also pointed out Myanmar literally just between the next two mountains, at our closest point we were only a few kilometers away. As much as I’d love to add another country to my scoreboard I don’t think that’s a border I particular want to mess with for funzies.

The brochure for the hike had said 12km of ‘medium’ difficulty as we did the next section I felt very lied to. I don’t consider a half hour climb up giant loose boulders to be ‘medium’ myself we were all dying at the top even Maria the Spanish gazelle. Thankfully the giant cave at the end of this was well worth ascent view wise but I was still puffing hard. When he started moving us onward and I realized we were climbing the rest of the way to the top of that particular mountain I began to get worried, not just that we were still going up but that everyone but Maria was showing signs of serious leg fatigue in the brief moments we were heading downhill, stumbling or wobbling a fair bit. Thankfully it was around this time that Jon called a halt and we had lunch which turned out to be various bags of noodles and rice for the vegan, veg and carnivore among us. Mine was a really nice spicy curry chicken and rice, the 2-days girls who’d had that the day before got noodles instead.


The second half of the day was a bit less rough in terms of elevation up… but definitely stretched the definition of medium difficulty even more as after an initial section which Jon said was on old time road through the area (as well as some caves that he described as being hidey holes during wars with Burma) we headed on another path that was NOT a path for a solid 90minutes. Very narrow footholds, most of us grabbing at bamboo for support that may or may not still be solid, steep downhills that tested tired ankles and knees, it was rough. I’d done pretty well heat stroke wise this trip but was definitely feeling it a bit over the last 1/3. The outwardly fitter of the Slovenian girls had it worse however whenever we went downhill and she was probably nursing a sore hamstring.

For the most part our guide was great but over the last third of the hike he definitely pushed the pace a bit too fast. He seemed to be going by the pace Maria could set which was great… except Maria is a hiking nut that goes trekking in the Pyrenees every weekend all summer. The other five of us were struggling to keep up especially when the trail disappeared for the most part. At one point he called out ok next part flat then down (spoiler: it wasn’t flat, but it was open and sunny) and we were on the last stretch. The Slovenian girl groaned audibly at the start of another downhill section and I kept having to wait on her as she stopped as the trail was too slippery to pass by anyone safely. She eventually coaxed a promise from Jon that it was only another ten minutes… lies. The actual ten minute mark was where the serious pain began for all of us as it was a steep switchback where at times you were basically shuffle running from one tree to another… but in the end we all made it.

At some point Jon had explained to us that we’d actually take the truck to the waterfall as it was nearby but not right here, then end of our hike had us wading across a river at a washed out bridge location. Again it was dry season so I wondered what this river looked like a few months from now but Jon took our bags across for us and the rest of us just enjoyed cooling off and tried not to let the current sweep our tired legs out from under us. I’d stupidly forgotten to bring my water socks with me but eventually managed to struggle across the gravel to the truck once on dry land.

Don’t get me wrong, the hike was beautiful and I’m proud that I accomplished it (mostly) in one piece. I definitely question the person who wrote that brochure as I think it was probably the easiest it was all year right now and the brochure definitely doesn’t change for rainy season (basically all she did on my printout was cross off ‘raincoat’ on the list of items to bring.) I think with even a little bit of mud on that trail it would be fully hard for the full length and even as I would have called 1/2 of it ‘difficult’ terrain. It was also rather disappointing on the viewpoint front. The front half had a few good views, the cave was neat but the last half was mostly close in jungle/bamboo forest

The road from the trail end to the waterfall was godawful (it would be worse on the way out) but we were all still savouring the ride… given the waterfall apparently didn’t involve hiking I was a little worried it would be overrun with tour groups but I’d forgotten just how far we were from anywhere. We had it to ourselves and pretty happily dove in and fought the current over to get a solid massage by waterfall. I laughed pretty hard as the Slovenian girls pretty quickly got out shivering. I wouldn’t call the water warm but it was certainly not cold… I even said when they came back over ‘at least I can trust the brits not to think this is cold water’ and they laughed.

Back on the truck we drove out on one of the worst roads of my life, forded a number of rivers and coughed up so much fine dust into the semi open bed that any cleaning factor we’d felt from the falls was gone instantly we all felt caked with dirt. Given how bad the shower had turned out to be at my guesthouse I was steeling myself for an unpleasant wash. Just before we arrived at the main road we passed through one of the ‘Chinese villages’ a cluster of ancestral Chinese people that have elements of Chinese architecture in their dwellings and who often speak only mandarin apparently.

Back along the road Jon pointed out some of the ridges we’d crossed that seemed now impossibly high up but we quickly settled into a stupor until our pee break. I unfortunately was feeling a bit heatstruck so was concentrating on avoiding motion sickness and basically pounding water, even Maria eventually wedged her tiny frame into the bench seat by some magic and tried to sleep. I made it feeling better, but when the twists and turns ended and we pulled up to my place I said quick goodbyes and hobbled over to my room… making it to the toilet just in time to lose my lunch. Luckily I could just roll over into the shower stall and start hosing off the grime of the trail after that and thankfully was feeling more human after that and an hour or so laying in bed.

This was still Khao Soi country and I’d spotted a street stall the night before making up delicious looking bowls of it the night before so once my appetite returned I found the stall, pulled up a baby stool at the tiny picnic table ordered a gorgeous bowl of it for the equivalent of $4. Sadly that’s actually expensive much like the burger the day before at around $10, Pai prices were definitely of the ‘captive audience’ variety compared to Chiang Mai but I also knew things would be worse in the islands next. I’d love to pretend I stayed up doing something fun but nope, I browsed the walking street for a bit and bought a tee shirt but it didn’t take long before I grabbed some water and a bag of chips at 7-Eleven and headed back to bed. I think I made a token attempt at watching a QI episode and passed out partway through.


The next morning I wasn’t feeling as bad as I’d feared. There was stiffness (and some blisters) but I was mobile. I’d wanted to sleep in but despite the night noise not being bad this hotel’s soundproofing was truly abysmal and before 8am rolled around I could hear a chainsaw running somewhere, roosters crowing and martial music playing as well as some sort of rhythmic drum. I’d made no firm plans but unfortunately if you want to get anywhere around Pai you kind of need a scooter so I broke a personal rule and rented one. The roads were relatively less mental around here Thailand wise and it was also the day of the ‘all day float dj tubing party’ so most of the drunk and stoned teeny boppers were on the river and not on the roads.

I headed up to one of the other places I’d wanted to see here: Pai Canyon. It’s less a canyon and more an eroded formation on a ridgeline but the maze of pathways and steep drop offs is quite pretty. I didn’t do the full hike as it was full sun and I didn’t want to push it after the day before but had a good poke around. Hilariously the Thai tourist authority uses the phrase ‘the area is vast, similar to the grand canyon’ which takes some chutzpah.

The other place I travelled up to was the white buddha lookout which ‘you can drive right to it’ turned out to be quite the lie. It turned out you could drive right up to the base of the 500 or so steps up to the buddha. I guess they meant you could bypass the windy bit of road up to the gate which wasn’t a great walking road. I’d been told the view was worth it but I was not sure I had it in me and sat talking to the temple dogs for a bit before I mustered up the effort required. I grumbled but the view from the top was worth the climb, the Buddha statue definitely needs some TLC though. From the top of the stairs you got a panoramic view of the valley seeing just how tiny Pai was as well as the windy roads leaving in both directions.

Once down from the temple I had to make sure I returned my scooter. Technically I had it 24 hours but my bus out was leaving at 7 the following morning and I had a relatively early flight to catch from CM so I needed to be on it. The rest of the night was mostly people watching as I grabbed a curry and kind of marveled. I was definitely very in between ages on the audience here. As mentioned most of the crowd was gap year teens and early 20s types, a few slightly older hippie yoga instructor types… then there was a small but solid hunk of retirement age people visiting and staying in the nicer places and wandering the town for a bit before bed. I’m guessing they were more doing the short waterfall hikes/visiting the hot springs. Unfortunately while I made it through my own travels without injury I got run into a scooter when a combo of an inexperienced (drunk? rider) coincided with someone stumbling against me on the sidewalk and I’ve now got a fairly nasty gash and a couple of scrapes in my otherwise sore leg… Despite doing a very good job cleaning it I’m (now over a week later) still nursing it and have since had to go see a doctor and make sure it’s not infected/get an x-ray. Blue Cross is going to stop insuring me for Thailand as it’s the only place I ever make a claim on my travel insurance.

I tried to make it an early night but I now had a new neighbour next door and they were simultaneously very heavy footed and when they came back at two am I could distinctly hear them running to use and slamming the toilet seat multiple times though thankfully couldn’t hear any actual bodily fluid noises. Something about the construction of these cottages transmits sound through the beams I think. Unfortunately between that, other noises and the stress of having to be up early to make the transfer to that flight I think I only got about two hours sleep which probably compounded the ‘second day after’ pain from the hike. But, the transfer to the islands is a tail for next time.

Honestly Pai was interesting but I don’t think I’d ever go back. I feel like you could get equivalent hikes elsewhere with better vibes and less of a hippie spring break vibe. Sort of the same vibe I have with Khao San in Bangkok… I don’t mind being near the area but unlike Bangkok there really isn’t much else in Pai to get around the core of that. Going further out that road loop more independently would be fun, I don’t think I’m young and dumb enough to do the whole thing on a motorbike anymore though. If I can ever get someone to come with me it’s probably worth splitting a private driver for a multi day trip given such things don’t break the bank here.

Still I don’t regret it as I wanted some new experiences this trip which is where the back half of this program comes in. It’s now time for the ocean adjacent portion of proceedings in our next post.

Bonus Round: Extra Photo Dump

Hey Everyone, here are some extra photos from the first half of the trip now that I’m home and can fight the server with some extra tools/better internet. Some of these may/will be repeats but I wanted to upload some things from the other camera as well. Enjoy!

Athens and Santorini

Athens is a heck of a city, hopping, compact to explore for a tourist and full of friendly people and great food. Heartily recommended!


Crete Views

A couple weeks before I left I wasn’t even planning on hitting Crete but I’m glad my cousin’s Jay and Kim had the recommendation because it was absolutely gorgeous even in low/dry season. I caught the start of the wildflowers coming out but I bet it’s gorgeous in another 2-3 weeks.

Herculean Beauty

My first taste of Crete was the rather run down Iraklio/Heraklion Airport as I waited at baggage claim to find out if my bag had successfully made the dash between the planes that I had. Much to my shock and delight it showed up rather quickly. Figures, I was planning to stay in one place for a few days so it could have caught up and nothing happens! I’m still paranoid after Madeira!

Life on the beach in Crete

The bus into the city proper was relatively painless as well though could have been better signposted. For some reason my google maps pointed me slightly wrong however and combined with the ‘help’ of a local I ended up getting off the bus about 2km short of where I actually needed to. Not the end of the world though as it was later in the evening at this point and I got to see the inner ‘Old City’ positively bustling with activity making me quite happy I’d booked a central hotel. The hotel itself was also not the best at directions having given me vague instructions better suited to arriving by car (figures my one hotel on Crete that had a parking lot would be for the stretch before I rented a car) and unfortunately on some of the maps all the back alleys of these old towns that date in some cases to the byzantine era kind of turn into a maze. Eventually I found the path! After passing what felt like all the cats in town staring me down I came to the Kipos Suites nestled at the end of an alley and looking like an island of modernity amongst the mix of crumbling post-war concrete and more ancient buildings in this section of old town.

My room was spacious (for Europe) and had a powerful shower that I immediately used to wash off the airport before hitting up the desk clerk for recommendations for a Cretan dinner. Unlike some of the clerks so far this trip this guy had strong opinions so I decided to check them out as they were all quite close. Actually all of Heraklion’s old quarter was super walkable and I checked out all the options before deciding on Xalali. This place had a fun looking family taverna atmosphere and I ended up sitting outside again as it was such a nice night. Dinner was a chicken with cretan cheese sauce which turned out to be a juicy chicken cutlet served with a sharp cheese and white wine sauce along with incredibly flavourful tomatoes and a side of actual bread an tzaziki (as well as olives completely wasted on me.) Unsurprisingly some of the neighbourhood felines found their way over to covet my dinner and it was a little like being back at home with certain dogs. As I quickly discovered was standard on Crete dinner ended with my waitress bringing me a small bottle of raki (local liquor like a less anis-y ouzo) for a shot and a small chocolate chip cake topped with a scoop of ice cream. The baffling thing to me is most of these places still have a dessert menu!

I decided to walk around a bit longer to work some of that off and discovered a plethora of churches in the old town, even by Greek standards. Nestled between the churches there was a warren of old streets, some pedestrianized, lots of late night food options of the meaty variety and a number of bakeries/patisseries open just as late (the hours on places here continue to baffle me.) Eventually though I succumbed to the allure of that comfy bed and headed back to watch a show and send some emails to discover that while the hotel was lovely it was definitely of the vintage of greek building where soundproofing isn’t really a thing. Less of a problem this night though again despite the hotel not being full as far as I could tell I’d been placed right near the main entrance and could hear the electric slide open a few times after I climbed into bed.

The next morning I woke fairly early and planned my trip out to the archaelogical site of the ruins of the palace at Knossos. This was so conveniently close to town that a city bus ran there and it conveniently embarked about a 3 minute walk from the hotel. Armed with a bacon, egg and cheese pastry for brunch I was on my way reasonably early as I wanted to hit the archaelogical museum back in town that has some of the finds from the site on the same day and I knew from experience at this point that winter hours would be stupidly short. I’d also decided that it was time to proactively find some laundry service before things reached critical mass in a less helpful place. The close place to the hotel was a bit more expensive than I’d hoped for wash and fold but I didn’t really want to waste any more time on it so I left it and hit the bus.

The site was very impressive but also a bit frustrating. I wasn’t about to hire a private guide for just me but the info on the signboards at the site seemed a bit selective. Thankfully my Lonely Planet (RIP 🙁 ) guidebook had a big section on the palace and I augmented it with some internet searching on breaks. The palace was at various points the capital of ancient Crete, particularly in the days when the Minoan civilization conquered a big chunk of the modern Greek area. Trade was quite wide and there were elements found here that hint at contact far and wide across the Med.

The site’s documentation hero worships the Brit who lead most of the early excavations but also doesn’t do the greatest job of mentioning how controversial some of his restoration work was. Like most of that era of Archaeologist he seems to have come to a conclusion of what he thought a site/subsite was and stuck to it. Some of the restoration as a result may bear little resemblance to reality. That said, most of the site is untouched and his finds revealed a lot of what we’ve come to know about the Minoans. It’s a fascinating place even taken with a grain of salt especially when you remember that this massive palace predates the parthenon by a millenium. Not going to lie, seeing all these places is making me want to play some Civilization on my computer when I get home.

Back in town I discovered happily that the bus pathed right by the Museum so I hopped off and inside. I was disappointed to discover they didn’t have an audio guide but there was an app with extra context though in this case the English commentary was actually great so I felt spoiled. This was another place with some great future pottery inspirations especially in some ancient ‘marine decorated’ pots. The museum was great but despite my reasonably early start I really only just had time for both before it was closing for the night and I headed back to my hotel on foot to have a bit of a rest/do some research for further planning. In practice this actually turned into a 90 minute nap.

Once I’d woken up, picked up the laundry and thrown on something less ‘backpacker’ looking I headed to a restaurant recommended by my guidebook, a culinary guide and a few random reviews and discovered an absolutely enchanting farm to table place nestled in between a couple alleys between a church and a park. It would have taken some work to discover it without a map. Their emphasis on farm to table is sincere to the point where they have their own farm that supplies all the ingredients for the restaurant for 3/4 of the year (the rest of the year they supplement with other local organic farms.) Every dish has the distance from the table the farthest ingredient has come from marked on the menu. They also offer a tasting menu of 10+ olive oils which I did not indulge in. It was called Peskesi.

I ordered a slow cooked lamb and yogurt dish with rice pilaf and when it came out it was not at all what I expected. Completely melt in your mouth lamb crusted with flavourful cheese over a layer of herbed yogurt as an island in a pool of some of the most amazing rice I’ve ever tasted, almost more like a very wet risotto. It was incredibly delicious and I didn’t make it through more than 2/3 of it. This time the complimentary Raki was also flavoured with rose, I’m not normally a huge fan of florals in drinks but something about the interaction of the rose and the anise made this really hit the spot (though I only had two shots unlike some at nearby tables.) The dessert was unusual as it was a semolina based pudding smeared in a thin layer on the plate then drizzled with honey, lemon, cinnamon and almonds. The texture was interesting, I’d described it as a sweet thicker cream of wheat. It was really quite good but again I was stuffed and didn’t come close to finishing my included portion. Overall an incredible meal and arguably in the top ten of my life… and ridiculously cheap for the quality. I paid under $25 CAD if I recall.

I was kind of surprised that the busker scene in Heraklion wasn’t livelier but I guess with it being low season and ‘cold’ there wasn’t the draw. I ended up sitting by a venetian fountain from 1629 and just people watching for an hour or so before taking a circuitous route back to the hotel and calling it a day. In truth, at least in old town, the bar scene in general seemed kind of meh at this time of year. I’m guessing it’s likely livelier somewhere closer to the university or whatnot. There were a few small lounges that were quite hopping but Greece is definitely an ‘eat late then party late’ place.

Originally I had planned to leave the next morning and rent a car to move on and explore more of Crete but I’d had the luck to connect with the only diving company planning to start for the year before I left and staying in town an extra night was going to get me a dive on the Saturday so I spent friday finding a local rental car provider who’d rent me a small automatic. Honestly I need to re-learn how to drive standard but I figured chaotic greek town then sharp mountain roads probably wasn’t the time to struggle through it. The rest of the day was exploring the town a bit more and having a bit more of a relaxing day. I hit the other big museum in town, explored the harbour fort and partook of a snack or two in sidewalk cafes.

The dive shop itself was again right on a bus route and we weren’t starting at the crack of dawn so I stumbled in at about ten and got kitted up. This was a bit eye opening given recent changes as well as the fact that we were running on different equipment than I was used to as well as it being an SSI shop when I’m a PADI trained diver. Phil at the shop was great though and I met the other two divers on the trip and we drove about 30 minutes away to a small cove nestled at the bottom of a steep switchback. Oddly despite having done I think almost 40 dives now this is only the second time I’ve done a shore dive after the time in Cuba. The water was cool but not crazy cold for a Manitoban. The young german woman who was my dive buddy generally dove in the baltic so she wasn’t cold either. Our dive lead on the other hand was wearing a dry suit for some unknowable reason. Coward!

The bay we were diving in is apparently in the process of being turned into a marine reserve. I won’t pretend it was the most exciting dive I’ve ever done (first dive since Fiji was always likely to be a bit tamer) but it was an excellent time. Current/surge was relatively low, we had 15m visibility despite the cloud and managed to see some barracuda, a couple lionfish, some trumpetfish and a number of grouper. Only sadness was not seeing any octopus since Phil had said they saw them quite often but overall it wasn’t a bad dive.

Back on dry land I had a tipsy moment when I forgot to baby my legs a bit having forgotten that I have not used flippers for a while but then had a lovely chat with two other divers who were prepping to go out with a scooter. They were a couple (one German, one Belgian) who were living in Crete at the moment and sampling the dive sites around the island while things were quiet. We shared stories of our fave places elsewhere and I got a couple future targets to think about aiming for. Eventually we wished them well as they headed in and Phil had finally struggled out of his drysuit and we headed back to the shop. I’d stupidly let myself run out of small change for the bus and didn’t think a bus driver would take kindly to me trying to break a fifty so I walked a few blocks back towards town until I found a fruit market, bought a banana for some potassium and some dried pineapple for dessert then made it back to town to pick up my rental car.

I am mildly ashamed of the fact that I’m not confident driving a stick, to be honest that was for one marathon road trip 20+ years ago and nothing since so it’s not really surprising. Unfortunately it makes renting a car outside North America a bit harder/pricier. At the smaller local rental place I ended up using they really only had one option which was a micro Hyundai hatch that just barely fit my suitcase in the back and had an engine that sounded like it was going to die at some point. Still, I wanted to hit the roads of this beautiful island so I put-putted away, trusting my gps to get me outside of the old town at least and then at that point there’s really only the one main east-west highway on the island. I was heading for Chania, the ‘second city’ of the island which meant heading from the more central Heraklion to almost the west coast.

Quick side note here. Cretan drivers are absolutely mental. At almost no point of this section of highway are there two lanes in one direction. There are only small sections with a dashed central line and the road follows the coast for most of its length so there are a ton of blind corners. This does not stop people from passing. You’re expected to pull off half or fully onto the shoulder to let these nutbars by. Eventually I got used to it but yikes. Thankfully the road itself wasn’t in bad shape and the views were absolutely gorgeous. Crete is a stunning place and at times really reminds me of northern California, especially at this time of year where many sections are quite arid running down to wild looking coastline.

I arrived in Chania (Ha-nia) not long before sunset having not actually booked anywhere to stay yet. To be honest I’d been worried I’d be too tired after diving to make it past the halfway point but it hadn’t turned out to be an issue. As I reached the outskirts of the modern town I pulled into a closed business and started browsing booking.com for something that looked decent. I was comparing things on a map when someone knocked on the window and I nearly jumped out of my skin, immediately thinking the business owner was grumpy. It turned out to be an older British woman who asked me if I had any jumper cables. She and her Canadian partner had broken down nearby. Obviously I did not in my baby rental but I agreed to try giving her a boost if she bought some at a nearby garage. This being a typical greek road this involved me fighting across a street the wrong way and bumping up onto a curb to get mostly out of traffic. Sadly the boost was unsuccessful. At first I assumed it was just my baby battery not having the oomph to help their similarly sized car but it sounded in the end like it was some more major electrical fault. They thanked me profusely anyway and actually offered to let me stay in their guest room but informed me they were 30 minutes out of town back the other way. Had I had more time I might have taken them up on it but I definitely wanted to stay in Chania’s beautiful old town so I wished them well and booked myself in.


Venetian Old Town

Chania’s old town is dotted with buildings from the era when the Venetians owned the island. Narrow cobbled streets run into church plazas and then run down to the beautiful harbour. The fortifications remain on two sides helping make the district close to but not quite car-free. I was arriving on saturday night and things were already hopping in that area. I knew I was unlikely to get anything too close parking wise but it ended up being quite the ordeal. Unlike most places in Crete a lot of the street parking in that area was paid and when I finally found a spot I ran into issues getting their parking app to work. Ended up having to tether my laptop to get a confirmation email because the only credit card I could get to work would send my fraud alerts to an older email. (Side note to people who run so-called travel cards, maybe don’t have confirmations only be SMS-able when plenty of travel folks get travel SIMs while abroad?) Eventually I was set until midnight and parking was apparently free on sundays so I hoped things would be fine. That said I can’t fathom how terrible the parking must be in high season.

Setting off into the narrow old lanes with my suitcase clattering away I noticed again the winter deadness. This was saturday night, some of the main thoroughfares were hopping and a few restaurants were packed but almost every hotel I passed looked shut completely. When I found my hotel it looked SLIGHTLY more alive but was locked and no one was visible inside. I rang the bell at the Vilelmine and got a long wait followed by a confused sounding mess of greek. Tentatively I said “checking in?” wondering if I’d somehow buzzed an apartment. A lady walking past took pity on me and spoke to the person on the intercom and translated. I’m guessing that was maybe a family member of the owner because when he showed up 5 minutes later he spoke quite good english and apologized that he’d missed the booking notice on his phone. He chatted with me a bit about the town and told me that Chania’s old town was so beautiful because it was one of the few places the Germans hadn’t wrecked in WW2 as it was their last refuge/where they ended up surrendering. Makes sense but would have been a bit awkward to know that when my german dive buddy was extolling the beauty of the place a few hours prior.

I was clearly the only person in this hotel as when he came in the door he flipped on a bunch of breakers saying “I guess you’d like the hot water.” I was only half paying attention though as the building was gorgeous. It was a narrow Venetian townhouse that had been subdivided into quite large suites and had gorgeous art on the walls and a spiraling staircase leading upwards. My host showed me up to one of them and I found a massive bedroom, a tiny couch area with coffee and a minifridge and a balcony that overhung the church square. He had definitely not been wrong about wanting the hot water though as since I’d already checked out before diving I’d had to drive a couple hours still salty from the dive (ick.)

Showered and mildly more presentable I spent the rest of the night wandering the town. It was an odd mix. While many many hotels and restaurants were closed, others were completely packed. When facing the harbour itself it was as if everything on the west side was shut down. Yet at the same time there were floods of people around and a much younger skewing crowd than I’d seen in many of the towns since Athens. This made more sense later when I found out that there was both a NATO naval base and a large university near town. This also explained the larger number of young American voices I heard in the babble. I eventually ended up at a fish restaurant recommended by my host which ended up being a bit of a dud. Nothing terrible just underwhelming, but rescued by a small cone of citrus sorbet on the way back up the road. By this point the dive fatigue had indeed arrived and I decided to head back and get some sleep.


I’d forgotten the next morning was sunday. A cacophony of bells reminded me at around 7. I had been planning to get an early-ish start but my room being essentially right at the height of the belfry made damned sure I wasn’t sleeping any longer, especially when they went off again 15 minutes later. By the time I’d had another shower and gotten mostly ready to go I was able to sit out on the mini balcony with a glass of water and see parishioners going in and out and the orthodox chants of the service filled the chilly morning air. One of the church staff was outside setting up a buffet of food was no doubt going to be spending the next hour defending it from cats. I couldn’t help but laugh as one man came into the square with his two dogs, one leashed, one wandering off leash behind him… he eventually stopped mid-square, tied the two dogs together and left them waiting quite patiently tied to one another as he went into church for a blessing and returned about five minutes later.

Church theatre aside it was time to get moving. I’d decided to visit a famous beach at the southwest corner of the island and was mildly nervous if my wussy little car would make it or not. One guide I’d read said the last bit of the road wasn’t in great shape, the other said no issues. My rental company had warned me I wasn’t covered for gravel road recovery but in the end I decided to try and I’m glad I did. It was definitely the most european of european roads though, as once I got off the highway the secondary road kept going through cliff-side villages as we climbed a mountain pass. Cars would be jammed willy nilly, roads would barely be wide enough for one car much less the tour buses I knew must come this way in high season. I firmly got out of the way of the speed demons this time but overall it was mostly just fun at this time of year. My only regret was the lack of places at times to stop and check out the view properly.

Eventually the road opened up to a view of a gorgeous aqua sea and the road spilled out onto a somehow even more rugged coastline. I was all set to say this is now the closest I’ve been to Africa before I remembered that I’ve been to Gibraltar… whoops. The beach itself is famous for pink ‘sand’ which is actually crushed shells floating over the sand. Due to tides/wind I wasn’t there at peak beauty by the sounds of it but it was still gorgeous. Apparently the ‘island’ offshore is often connected by a spit of the pinkish sand but on the day of my visit the lagoon had completely separated it. The lagoon was totally wadeable though and at spots was only ankle deep, at first I just waded out a bit but eventually decided to go all the way across to explore the spit of an island jutting out in the bay. As I was putting my shoes away (I’d worn a bathing suit though had not been sure if I’d swim or not) a couple started walking back from the island with their two dogs who made it clear the depth never got above waist high.

The island was gorgeous, small coves everywhere with picturesque rocks and slowly rolling waves coming in off a barrier reef. The ocean pools reflecting with sheens of emerald and indigo. I read later that after increasing crowds for a number of years they have been cracking down and are trying to return more of the area to nature/keep permanent fixtures at a greater distance so hopefully the main shoreline will eventually be just as great. I gather the main beach is basically a giant expanse of deck chairs and umbrellas come July and August. On this particular ‘winter’ day I only saw about 15 people total all day. I spent a couple hours in a few of the coves, did a bit of snorkeling and just generally relaxed and enjoyed the view. I’d definitely love to come back some day and snorkel when it was a bit warmer but it was still absolutely worth the trip.

Back in Chania I found a spot in an entirely free lot that I found mention of online (mostly so I wouldn’t have to log on and pay for a couple hours at 7am the following morning) then tried to have a look around some shops. This was definitely not a sunday shopping town though, especially at low season so in the end I just did a lap of the harbour, took some photos then went back to to my room for a bit of a nap and sitting on my balcony for a while writing some of this travelogue. Dinner was much better that night as I indulged in some saganaki and souvlaki in one of the narrow alley eateries before curling up with a book until bed.

I lingered for a bit monday morning wanting to check out some of the stores and hoping they’d actually open at the time google listings said they would, thankfully a few of them did and I made a couple of small purchases for folks back home. I had one more full day with the car and decided to race to the other end of the island just to have seen a bit of each side. Now that I was more used to the roads this went fairly smoothly, especially since the highway east of Heraklion is markedly better and even has some passing lane areas. A few hours later I ended up in Agios Nikaulaus (St. Nicholas) a town on the edge of yet another gorgeous bay full of glassy turquoise waves. Other than beaches the draw here in prime season is an offshore island that was a leper colony until the 70s.

On the plus side street parking was free here, on the negative my hotel had neglected to inform me that their street in the warren was under construction and thus their instructions on getting to the front door were useless. In the end I parked on the waterfront and dragged my bag around the breakwater until I found a way to climb up to the hotel where I found no host just my name and a key. This was the first serious dud of a hotel for the trip as the beds were hard, the toilet needed to be fought with to not run after a flush and the construction the next morning started back up early. Things seemed almost Santorini dead in this town and other than a lovely beach I visited 20km away there wasn’t much of excitement happening (but it would probably be hopping in summer.)

My flight back to Athens wasn’t until fairly late the next day so I dragged out the car adventures as long as possible and instead of cutting straight back to Heraklion I drove down to the south coast and back across the mountains of the spine of Crete. Tons of lovely views but I found myself baffled by a couple of the towns on the coast where absolutely gorgeous oceanfront property was being used for businesses you’d never expect like auto wreckers etc. Also I got a delicious feta croissant. The southeast of the island was absolutely covered in greenhouses… like acres and acres of them. I’m curious as to what they grow in them that’s such a big crop. As I crossed over the middle I ended up driving through olive groves and vineyards, two of the products of the island I’d already sampled quite a lot of. Unfortunately my car also started beeping at random a few times with no accompanying warning lights. I got out and checked tire pressure etc but everything seemed to be running just as well as before even though that wasn’t great. In the end it went away after a restart for a while and then stopped happening completely after another 45 minutes so I rolled the dice and kept driving.

Of course… after having no rain to speak of… once I’d dropped the car off that afternoon and had fully 5 hours to kill before my flight there were a number of short downpours. Eventually I gave in, stopped running to hide under canopies in between stretches reading on a park bench with my suitcase and found a burger joint, ordered some food and loitered my heart out until it was time to hop the airport bus. Actually to be honest I probably would have left it another hour at least but I was starting to get the stinkeye at the cafe and figured I might as well. Low season was in evidence at the airport too however as very little was open and large stretches of the airport had temporarily been barricaded until business improved.

Overall Crete was a blast and I’d come back in a heartbeat (though at a warmer time of year to check out more dive sites, do more swimming, see a different side of the island. I’d honestly love to be back with someone else as well, if only to get to order more of some of those menus to share at dinner.

Santori-no fun for you

Fira from the bay

I slept a bit fitfully the night before the ferry, the way you do before early travel and not helped by someone noisily throwing out trash at three am in between incredibly violent bursts of rain. The plan was to hit the subway not long after it opened for the morning and catch it to the port where my ferry was leaving at solidly “WHAT?” o’clock. It was just as well I was very conservative with my time estimates as it turned out my ferry was in the absolute opposite end of the port and I must have missed the map that said so and/or the sign that pointed to the shuttle bus that arrived at the ferry just as I’d hoofed it around a ferry terminal probably 4x the size of anything I’ve seen at home. Eventually I got there though, all of 15 minutes before final boarding, plonked my luggage in a rack and found my seat just as the rain finally came back and started lashing the deck. Small favours. As much as I would have loved to spend the day staring out the window at sunny seas and islands in the end I was a bit dozy through the first part of the voyage anyway and better to have rain on a travel day than it forcing me inside while at a destination.

After a couple hours we started intermittently docking at islands before Santorini. Despite the looming low clouds each one looked gorgeous and inviting. They also looked incredibly dead people wise. I’d been warned by my research that the islands were quiet in low season. While in July and August there are multiple ferry options, high speed directs, inter-island bounces etc we were firmly in one slow boat a day territory at the end of February.

One of the en route Islands, Paros I think?

For those who don’t know the island of Santorini (or Thira for the actual main island I gather) is one part of a formerly quite large island that blew its top in ancient times and the modern ‘Santorini’ is mostly build on one part of the Caldera rim. If you’ve seen images of a greek island with white towns built on what seems like impossibly steep cliffs it’s a good chance this is it. I’d gone back and forth a few time on whether to spring for one of the ‘Caldera View’ suites and in the end had decided to save my money and spent it elsewhere. I’m glad I did as the weather was ‘fine’ but rarely super sunny and I was unsuccessful in getting one of the really quality sunsets they’re famous for while there.

The Rim Path

One thing that isn’t dead is the taxi industry despite the time of year and they want pretty extortionate rates to go anywhere on the island. As a solo traveler I cab only when necessary and it definitely wasn’t here with a modern motorcoach bus transfer available to my home base (the capital Fira) for only 2 Euro. The ride up was a pretty impressive zigzag up the Volcano’s rim and across some of the fertile lands at the top until we arrived in a village of white washed buildings, hotels and tavernas/restaurants… all of which were closed completely.

I exaggerate only slightly. I’d guess at least 95% of businesses were firmly battened down at this point which was more intense than I was expecting closure wise. To be honest more than a few of them looked like they maybe hadn’t been open since Covid Lockdowns but my hotelier said most things had reopened. The sheer number of places that were completely stripped out was shocking though. As my time on the island went on I did see some of these businesses being sandblasted/repainted and I gather some of this activity was for the start of April (Orthodox Easter being their first busy weekend.) Compounding the frustration was the fact that most of these business do not update their business hours for offseason on their website if they have one or on google. It was pretty frustrating. You know a place is dead when their McDonalds (incidentally the first one I’ve seen this trip) is closed.

My (cheaper) hotel was on the secondary road and I clattered down the crappy pavement after the sidewalk gave out until I found a tiny sign and a steep ramp down. I’m a little afraid I may murder my suitcase with all these cobbles (yes I skipped the old reliable backpack this time as it didn’t seem necessary.) Thankfully it was a lovely little place with a number of suites scattered around a neighbourhood and I was shown to a little second floor unit with a balcony terrace and a comfy bed. Unfortunately he more or less confirmed nothing was running excursion wise either though he told me to check at the travel agency where they confirmed it. At this point I was starving so I pretty much immediately went back up to the main road, found one of the few things open was a soulvaki place (gasp!) and chowed down on a pita. Properly victualed I began exploring the internecine pathways of the town, pretty much all lined with closed down jewellery shops, souvenir stores, snack bars etc. Restaurant wise there were two souvlaki stands with outdoor seating, an asian fast food place and two not great looking sit down chinese places. When things got a bit busier a day or two later it was mostly chinese nationals I saw so perhaps the latter still being open isn’t surprising.

Snaking my way down towards the caldera I could help but gasp at the view. It’s truly breathtaking and probably wild if you’re afraid of heights. You look out towards the other islands that form the rim while in either direction beside you stretches an absolute hodgepodge of bulbous buildings jutting out over the edge like cliff sparrow nests. (Empty) infinity pools are everywhere the better to enjoy the sunset with your traveling companion. Whether you QUITE get that luxury experience from the photos when there are other balconies inches to your left and right I don’t know, especially since in some the cheaper ones near the top you also have schmucks like me who can just lean over and look past your balcony to the sea.

The dock right below the town apparently is often clogged with cruise ship tenders and there is a cable car and a long set of 500+ stairs often covered in donkey dung. Apparently you have the option to have a ride part way via donkey as well. A lot of the deliveries are done by teams of donkeys as the narrow paths aren’t accessible even to carts. I chose not do do the 500 stairs as the cable car wasn’t running if I decided I wasn’t up to coming back up.

That first evening I walked most of the way to the next town up cliff-side path (it goes about 9km to the last town on the island) before snaking my way back through the alleyways since the heavy cloud was not cooperating for sunsets. As there was basically nothing to do at that point I walked back, decided to skip a gelato (regrets as this was the last time it was open during my stay) and headed back to my room for a movie and a think. I’d purposely kept things flexible here in case I’d wanted to extend things on the island but instead it seemed time to work out when/how to leave.

This is when I discovered the ferry strike was going ahead for the day I’d planned to leave. Long story short nothing was sailing on the calendar day I wanted to leave. There was a ferry starting from Athens (Piraeus) just after midnight, arriving at Santorini around 5 am then going onward to Crete the following morning. Unfortunately that basically made my options to be “get a hotel for another night and leave at 4am, pay a middle of the night taxi+luggage+time surcharge on top of the ferry fare and get to Crete probably wrecked again. Alternatively since the air traffic controllers were not on strike after all (they’d planned to join in) I could fly. Unfortunately again because low-season there were no direct flights at the moment… I dithered about it for the next day but then yes I booked a flight back to Athens to then turn around and basically fly back over Santorini to land in Crete. Wasteful as hell but I wanted to make sure I got out of there without wasting another full day, especially if the strike had delayed that ferry further.

Oia – from the point

Still before that happened I hopped a bus over to the end of the island the next day. If Fira is the pretty girl Oia is the supermodel. It’s DEFINITELY that white washed walls/blue roofed village you’ve seen on a greek travel poster. Felt like I was in an off brand Mamma Mia sequel where they didn’t want to pay the extras. I spent a few hours wandering around the various paths, marveling at how many hotels were just closed completely with many looking like they needed two months work to be opened again. Store wise there was a bit more open here, mostly souvenirs and a couple women’s clothing/jewellery shops. Pretty much everything on the island is pricey but I guess the Oia folks know everyone is coming there for sunset no matter where they’re staying on the island, even in the off season.

I ended up spending a couple hours on the tip of the point at a small fortification getting snuggles off and on from a very affectionate cat and reading a book in the sunshine. It was a lovely day, I just would have really loved to be able to take a cruise around the islands too while I was there (and dive some of the volcanic caves.) Despite sitting there enjoyably for hours as it began to get busy for sunset I climbed further into the hotel neighbourhood figuring I’d be able to find a good vantagepoint that was less busy given they were all closed. I found an excellent balcony… but it was eventually ruined by a french couple who both kept hacking up a lung/sniffling until I retreated for my health… then by a large cloud bank rolling in just before sunset. I grumbled as I caught the last bus back to Fira, grabbed some food then booked my flight(s) out.

I realize that I neglected to mention the one new thing I’d found open after the first night which was a delicious bakery hidden in the bowls of a building behind a pretty bad looking bar and a closed fish spa. I’d seen a girl walk out with a koulouri (greek sesame bagel thing) and had wandered into the darkness and come away with a delicious ham and cheese pretzel. The next morning (my luggage left with my hotel man) I grabbed a feta pastry and took another bus, this time to the Akrotiri historical site. This is an ancient town buried by ash not unlike Pompeii with the note that most of the inhabitants evacuated here. It’s a neat site with a full canopied building over everything and excavation ongoing. It’s also right by the sea so as I waited for my bus back I stuck my feet in the water for the first time this trip. Chilly but no worse than home in the summer.

Akrotiri archaelogical site

With that though, Santorini time was over. A quick bus back to Fira, the long trudge to and from the hotel to get the luggage and another bus to the Airport and it was time to go. Have I mentioned I went through like 4 books while there? The flight was mildly stressful as we started boarding late and had to take a bus out to the plane so I started sweating my connection, especially when while disembarking I got stuck behind a woman who insisted on opening her carryon to put away her coat and blocking the entire line. In the end I had to run through the terminal as it was already marked final boarding when I got inside (our plane being parked at the ass end of nowhere and me again missing the first bus back to the terminal.) Still, I made it, got on another absurdly short flight and took another bus to the old town of Heraklio (Iraklion) the capital of Crete! More to come.

PS I don’t want to seem super down on the island. It’s a beautiful place and I don’t doubt the stories about how it gets massively OVERcrowded in the summer but I would have loved even slightly more in between. It seems like October might be the time to visit while things are still running and the seas are warmer but after the crush.

Hellenic Adventure 2024

Me by some historic building ;)

Hey, it’s the Parthenon!

It’s adventure time again, hello all 10 people that read these travelogues. I know some of you cringe a little bit with how seat of my pants I sometimes travel and to you I apologize because this trip has definitely had some of the lowest planning effort of any of them. There were a variety of reasons for this but it mostly came down to not being comfortable booking a trip until the last minute then randomly deciding to go to Greece after flights for my initially planned revisit of Thailand doubled in price. Greece has always been on the list to visit but I’ll be honest this trip basically came down to seeing what was a decent price over a period I could fit between on call weeks and here we are.

So hey, Greece! Souvlaki! Zorba! History! Windex! (scratch that last one, I bought travel health insurance.)

My flight out was actually at a sane hour and included a long enough layover at Pearson that I didn’t have to sprint down the latest convoluted path between domestic and international. I’d been happy to see that my randomly assigned seats had all been acceptable and I didn’t have to shell out extra money for seat selection… was less enthused when I got a text 30 mins before boarding Toronto to Munich that my seat had been changed. It turned out I’d worried for nothing though as I ended up getting moved into Economy preferred for free and had a row of 4 to myself. Always nice for the overseas hop. Turns out the flight was about half empty. I was surprised but I wasn’t going to argue. As usual I didn’t sleep more than a few disjointed 15 minute periods and was running on fumes by the time I made my way through EU customs and over to my next gate.

In the end I didn’t nod off at the gate either, partially through worry they’d change my gate and I’d miss it as the signage/announcements in the area weren’t very good (decidedly un-German of them…) and partially due to the strange man who sat down across from me after about 30 minutes with a large produce bag full of ripe bananas… slowly eating at least 6 of them over a relatively short period of time. Eventually we boarded and again had an empty seat next to me this time, not a bad round of airplane luck.


I’d done enough research to know the cheapest way into town from the airport in Athens was via the subway built for the Olympics. For the record, when available airport trains are the best. Even if you have to take a cab for the final hop you get a nice introduction to the mood of the city you’re visiting. The Athens one is particularly handy as it’s just a spur station on one of the main lines and as such took me straight downtown.

The busy old town neighbourhood not far from my hotel

I was less enthused about my hotel’s directions which basically just said exit at one of these four metro stations then “you can enter off such and such a street or alternatively ‘this other street'” which isn’t the most helpful when it’s a) dark b) greek alphabet signs most of the time c) you haven’t been able to buy a local phone card yet. In the end I bit the bullet and used a day of rogers roaming to get through things. Just as well. Both entrances were terribly signposted, I’ll try to snap a pic when I’m back in Athens later but essentially it was a small van sized archway into a corridor on the right and I just happened to look up far enough at the right moment a scooter went by and illuminated a dirty plastic sign way up on the interior wall. (The gps tried to send me through another business on another block.) Luckily when I found got into that courtyard there was a bright modern sign showing the way to a tiny but sparkling clean hotel with a great location.

Wasn’t expecting to get such a great view essentially just off the plane.

Given that it was about 7pm local at this point and I’d been up something like 32 hours I did the sensible thing and (almost) immediately went out for food knowing that I’d crash when I crashed so fueling up first was the best bet to make that sleep beat any jetlag. I was kind to others and showered off a full day of travel first with a solid 20 minutes under a surprisingly nice waterfall shower but then got dressed and hit the streets. Heading south towards the Acropolis (into what was clearly the happening area) I peered down alleys for likely spots for a bite. Pretty much every cafe I saw was packed and I really wasn’t looking for a big roast meat and potatoes type fill up so when I stumbled across a place called Zeyroun I was sold. I later found it listed in multiple food guides to the city.

It might have been sacrilege to not start out with a greek meal my first night in Athens but instead I had a Zeyroun wrap which reminded me of an Iraqi dish I had once but forget the name of. It was a mildly spicy ground meat and tomato and za’atar blend baked into a crispy flat bread. The cook then freshly resizzled it, threw yoghurt and baba ghanoush and some other goodies on it and brought it out to me at an outdoor counter seat. The flavours were both familiar and exotic and I absolutely devoured it, belately remembering I hadn’t eaten since the overseas flight and not much of that (because Air Canada.)

For the issues I’d had finding the hotel it was immediately clear that I’d have no problems finding my way back as just downhill the cross street turned into a pedestrian only lane that led directly to a view of the fully lit Acropolis and that was was full of people having a fun friday night. My one semester of Russian now coming back to me and helping me decipher the Greek alphabet a bit (cyrillic being essentially a superset of greek iirc) I memorized the name (as most of you know I’m a memorize the map/learn the lay of the land/screw gps person) and set off to explore as long as my fuel lasted.

The tiny Orthodox church surrounded by the pedestrian shopping/eating district.

It wasn’t super long, another two hours I think but I walked up to the lower wall of the Acropolis mount, explored a few snaky lanes and large church plazas and made my way up to the Greek Parliament and watched a changing of the guard. In the main square I listened to two incredibly talented street musicians doing old rock standards then gave into the inevitability of sleep and started heading back only to find one of the best pianists I’ve seen in recent years hammering away on an organ on wheels. Since she was conveniently close to a gelato stand I grabbed a cup and found a step to perch on. Hanging out watching street musicians has actually become somewhat of a trip opening night tradition for me on my travel adventures and this one will be a hard outing to beat.

Still, it was a tired tired traveler who got back to the hotel and climbed into bed after just barely remembering to take off socks and set an alarm for the next morning.


Come morning I made the lovely/terrible discovery that even my little mid tier hotel’s feta was going to make going home to domestic brands very sad. Even for a euro breakfast bar it was a bit odd but delicious proper greek yogurt with drizzle of honey and some granola + some charcuterie was hard to say no to. At some point during the trip I’ll succumb to the lure of an sausage egg mcmuffin though.

While browsing one of the books before getting out of bed I realized I’d inadvertently done the first 3rd or so of Rick Steves’ Athens city walk so after trying and failing (due to shop hours) to get a traveler SIM card for my phone I set out to finish that listening to the guide. While I find Rick’s stuff does lean a bit ‘older crowd’ it was nice to get some cultural background to some of the things I was seeing and I do think his major city/capital guides are great.

This trip took me back down into the plaka ‘old town’ section and along past several churches including the home metropolitan of the Greek Orthodox faith, down to the ruins of Hadrian’s arch and a look through the fence at the remnants of the temple of Olympian Zeus. Several sources had pointed out the view of the latter from the fence line wasn’t much worse than paying the admission and you’d also get a better overhead view of the site from the acropolis.

Athens is kind of shockingly compact, at least in terms of things that appeal to tourists. The fact that most of the history is SO old and that the city dwindled away to relatively nothing for some of the intervening years means almost everything that most people are dying to see is clustered around the Acropolis. I plan to expand my horizons a bit upon my return at the end of the trip but to be honest I didn’t have to do anything but walk until I headed to the ferry terminal to head to the islands.

As I listened to the audio guide I got a better feel for some of the winding lanes I’d traversed the night before and some of the pre-trip neighbourhood discussions felt a bit more real. One of the most interesting was “little Analfi” a tiny neighbourhood built for craftsmen from that island right under the acropolis wall and bearing convincing resemblence to the kind of homes you expect to see in a greek islands setting. Many of these ‘island cottages’ are apparently now owned by well to do Athenians who want a downtown pied-à-terre. Very neat however as at points you’re squeezing in the narrow path between two bright white walls and expecting to walk out into the set of Mamma Mia only to look up and see the Acropolis looming overhead.

Eventually I snaked my way through the market streets and made my way into the Ancient Agora site. It’s a surprisingly small area and almost entirely fully ruined, especially compared to the Roman forum but it was impossible to forget that many of the roots of democracy started where I now standing. (cue Kent Brockman.) Some parts of the area have been reconstructed, others could probably use a little more TLC but with some imagination you could still visualize just how impressive this must have been 2500 years ago.

As I exited the Agora and made my way back to Monastoriki Square I had a decision to make. I was dying to see the Acropolis mount itself but I’d discovered the winter hours were far more limited and I wouldn’t be able to go up just before sunset as I’d hoped. At this point I’d walked a ton already and I’d have to hustle to get to the gates in time to have enough time… add in that fact that I’d have to climb to the top on my defective and tired feets and it felt like a coin flip, but in the end I couldn’t wait. I’ve been wanting to see the Parthenon in person forever and it felt wrong to wait another day.

No doubt the first of many

In relatively recent times most of the roads right around the mount have been converted to pedestrian only pathways and making my way up basically meant passing a giant flea market of vendors and restaurants before reaching the entrance to the ‘park’ itself. I mean you’ve all seen pictures, it’s definitely a bit of a climb (especially for a prairie boy who doesn’t see hills too often) but wow is it worth it. Reaching the Propylaia (entrance gate) was incredibly cool but as I emerged onto the top of the hill and saw the Parthenon and Erekthion I was blown away. This definitely wasn’t one of those ‘man I thought it would be bigger’ moments. I wrote a couple papers on these buildings in university (and the ‘Elgin’ Marbles) and seeing them in person was definitely one of those damned Plamandon life list things I can cross off.

Some famous temple…

As I walked around the site it somehow felt more real than other ancient places I’ve been. You’re walking where some of those big names you learned about in school days actually walked. All of those cobbles are smooth and slippery because people have been coming here for a shockingly long chunk of human history. Even in the dark times for Athens this has been a special place. If only the damned Venetians could have kept from blowing up the Parthenon. I’ll let photos do a bit of talking here as it’s been a few days and the history nerd in me could still go on ad nauseum here. Let me just say that the architecture is still gorgeous and impressive and even the scaffolding and crane of the ongoing restoration didn’t diminish that (though I’ll have to go back and see it again if they ever finish the project.)

As I saw the staff preparing to herd us out at five o’clock I had definitely drunk it all in, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I pay for another admission when I get back to Athens. If nothing else there are some lovely views.

My feet were absolutely done as I made my way down the steps. For those who don’t know my grandmother and mother handed off terrible arches to me to the point where I need orthotics and standing on uneven or hard ground can get pretty excrutiating relatively quickly. The combination of a ton of walking and the rest had left me in need of a rest so I climbed nearby Mars/Ares Hill and sat to watch the sunset. Unfortunately I ended up swarmed by a tour group of elderly folks some foolish guide led up there to repeatedly trip and fall. Regardless we were thwarted by some suspiciously rainy looking clouds rolling in before sunset (this has become a theme.)

Ares/Mars Hill – pre-octonegarian invasion

I’d managed to grab my first (amazing) souvlaki wrap from souvlaki row earlier for lunch so I wasn’t exactly aching for food so I walked a bit further and made my way back to the hotel, had a shower and flaked out for a bit… I just wasn’t expecting to nap quite so hard as I did… which led to me exploring the very cool Psyri neighbourhood for dinner at around 11. I ended up passing an american style barbecue joint and while I rationalized it (correctly it turned out) by imagining I’d have less choice on the islands and might not get a break from greek food for a bit… to be quite honest I mostly just thought the guy on the street eating a brisket sandwich looked like he was really enjoying it. Final verdict was a solid A brisket, the fries were very disappointing though. As a Winnipegger who enjoys his greek burgers and fries back home too much, the fact that most fries I’ve had here have been undercooked and sad is disappointing. Perhaps that was why they only won “11th best” bbq in europe.


The next morning armed with a store address I managed to snag a SIM card and moved back over to the parliament square to see the full changing of the guard ceremony. Honestly while neat it was a bit underwhelming from the distance I had to stand so I ended up leaving before they’d fully cleared the area and made my way to the Acropolis Museum. This is a fairly new museum that contains many of the finds from the mount and surrounding areas and is absolutely fascinating. It’s an interesting combo of finds from around the acropolis and a dedicated geometrically offset floor that does an exact layout of the parthenon, reproductions of the friezes and the pediments and a whole bunch of brit-shaming. I imagine most people are familiar with the Elgin marbles but whatever your feelings about Elgin taking them in the first place being in that lovely gallery with a sightline to their ancestral home it’s pretty clear where they should be now.

Kind of frustratingly because of the limited winter hours I didn’t really have time to fit in another museum that day once I was done. I don’t really get why they chop back from 8-8pm all the way to 9-3:30. Since the changing of the guard was at 11 I couldn’t have really been there any earlier either. At least stay open til 5, it’s not like the rest of Athens seems to do the siesta thing much. In the end I spent the rest of the day doing the entirety of the round the acropolis walk, browsed some shops (though any purchases will wait til I return to Athens) and people watched.

One thing I did love was getting to snag what was apparently one of the best galatabourikos in town. House made phyllo ballooned and filled with rich thick custard. I learned how to make one from dear departed friend Jim Pappas and his wife Barb’s greek cooking class eons ago but it’s kind of a pain to make so it’s been forever. This one was simultaneously flaky and rich and melt in your mouth and I devoured it all. Cheers Jim, thanks for introducing me to this tasty treat all those years ago.

One thing I notice on every visit to Europe and particularly in the mediterranean countries is how many more people smoke than in North America. Greece seems to take it to a new level though with many people seeming to love to stand in a cafe entrance and smoke as though the wind blowing across the square wasn’t just filling my face and ruining my snack. One friend I mentioned to says this will get worse out of the capital as well as enforcement of the indoor ban gets lax.

Dinner on the edge

With that my time in Athens had come to a close (for now.) I’d purposely scheduled a shorter stop up front on the trip knowing I could do some more when I come back for the flight home. For my final meal I climbed back up the hill to a little taverna I’d passed the first night, got a table by the stairs overlooking the old quarter and had a delicious little crock of baked feta smeared all over grilled pita and accompanied by another lemonade with honey and ginger.

I went to bed happy but sadly knowing I had to be up at 5ish to catch the ferry on to my next destination.

Stop! Hammer Time!

It was another rainy day the next morning as I repacked things more tightly for a flight on a small plane to Vanua Levu. I’d booked a flight direct to Savusavu and had been warned that it was a tiny airport reached by a tiny plane. Unfortunately internal fiji flights have a lower weight allowance so I was more than a bit worried about just how much it would cost me as the airline’s excess baggage page was a convoluted mess. Thankfully it turned out to be a realtively minor $42ish FJD of overage. Entertainingly I was also asked to step on the scale with my carryon which turned out to be a hint to just how tiny the plane was.

I actually didn’t realize myself as when I was sent out onto the tarmac unescorted all the lady said was ‘turn left.’ I was almost at the door of the first plane to the left when someone shouted at me. Turns out another plane had arrived since the door lady had been outside I guess and I walked around the wing of the larger plane to find myself boarding a little twin otter. We were all told to sit in our assigned seats as the weight distribution had been set up appropriately for the load. In the end there were only 7 of us on the plane as it taxied and took off.

Just one of thousands of beautiful structures just under the surface that you can see from the plane.

The view once we were up was spectacular. Fiji is just ridiculously full of reefs and lagoons and sandbars and from above with the sun shining down they were on display. I’m not usually one to take photos from an airplane window but come on.


Savusavu

savusavu airport
Security is uh… shall we say… a less intense process at this airport.

Savusavu itself turned out to be a tiny town covering the south rim of an old volcanic crater. The airport was barely more than a shack and some tarmac though and I was thankful when a former local visiting from Sydney let me tag along in his cab to town as despite this being one of only two flights no taxis had come to the airport. I’d regret not buying some more supplies at the time but I didn’t yet have a grasp of just how far from town my lodge was or what I had for kitchen supplies. I stocked up with water regardless and some other drinks and snacks and hopped back in the cab for the Vosa Ni Ua Lodge.

My digs for this stay, not the super odd hotplate/toaster oven combo.

The lodge was less a lodge than a small collection of Bures on a hill not far from a gorgeous crystal green bay just hitting low tide as I arrived. My room was a fairly large space with a small kitchenette along one wall with a very odd combination hot plate/toaster oven. Sadly the tide meant there wasn’t any hope of snorkeling that afternoon.

One of the other Vasa Ni Ua bures looking out across the garden towards the sea.

The caretaker of the property realized that I happened to have arrived on the one night of the week that a local garden restaurant was open roughly a 20 minute walk down the road. I gather in the higher season it’s a bit more raucous of an affair but there was a lively crowd of expats that live along the ‘Hibiscus Highway’ east of Savusavu and the pizza was phenomenal. It was a motely collection of Brits, Kiwis/Aussies a few Germans and several other Canadians. I gathered roughly half the folks lived here on a seasonal basis and a few of them were shorter stays. Luckily I’d thought to bring a flashlight as it was beyond pitch black the entire walk back home.

The Friday Night Pizza crowd.

Vosa Ni Ua seemed to be the last of the accomodations on this section of the highway and it was very much on the fringe of cell range, I’d tried to call my chosen dive folks but had to resort to email. Thankfully this operator was on the ball and actually got back to me at six the next morning when I was woken by the sun streaming through the louvres I hadn’t closed. I’d been warned that EVERYTHING in most towns in fiji closed on sundays so I happily agreed to go out for a few dives on sunday.

Saturday then was spent heading into town on the coastal bus and exploring Savusavu/provisioning some foodstuffs. It’s an odd little town. Based on what I saw in my guidebook I’d guess it suffered a bit from covid as a number of the restaurants and such seemed to have closed. It’s one of the only places you can legally enter the country with a yacht and has a bit of that vibe with two small marinas and a new large one being built just offshore. There are a couple yacht club/bars that I gather are filled with salty boaty types in the evenings during the busier months.

Fish and Chips by the Harbour

Savusavu bay is actually a volcanic crater and at several points along the beach steam rises from subsurface pools. There are a few hot spa pools available as well but I didn’t partake as it was 32 or so every day I was in the area.

If you look very closely you can see the beach steaming here from the volcanic forces

Hammerhead House

The next morning I was picked up by my divemaster bright and early and taken about halfway back to town to their home base at the Savisi Island resort. To my delight our proposed itinerary included two of the sites I’d most wanted to visit from earlier research. The wind was up a bit but by the time we got to the ‘dreamhouse’ site it had fallen enough that the divemaster’s scouting report revealed good vis and a helpful current. The big draw of this site is that it’s known to have frequent visits from hammerhead sharks… and to my absolute delight we saw not one but SIX of them during the course of the dive. Their weird silhouettes emerged from the gloom and set my heart pumping a bit, these aren’t little reef sharks after all though they’ll generally leave humans alone unless you’re trying to piss them off.

Happy tired dive man

Much to my disgust when we got back above water I got confirmation that one of our divers had seen a manta as well but I only caught the vaguest of shapes and didn’t get a good look. The hammers were amazing though and something I’m very happy to check off my diver’s SEEN IT list. As we surfaced and did our safety stop we were surrounded by an absolute cloud of batfish to the point where if you suddenly turned your head there’d be an eye staring into your mask until it startled away, it’s not uncommon to have a curious school check you out but it hasn’t happened for me with anything that size before.

After a surface interval with some of the tastiest pineapple I’ve ever put in my mouth (that the divemaster apparently grows in his garden the lucky jerk) we set out for another nearby dive site called Dungeons and Dragons. It’s absurd how close most of these are to shore and in fact dreamhouse was literally right off the outer reef by our lodge. Were the waves calm you could have kayaked out to it.

Beach across the road from my lodge, beautiful snorkeling lagoon in foreground, dungeons and dragons dive site just out beyond the barrier reef.

This site was a labyrinth of outcroppings, hard and soft coral and long swimthroughs. Swimming highlights were a couple of weird endangered wrasse I forget the specific name of, lots of clownfish and angel/damselfish. I wasn’t quite careful enough in one swimthrough and managed to yank my regulator out of my mouth snagging it on a rock but I was happy to find I was super calm about it and followed the recovery procedure without needing any help.

One of the coolest spots on the dive was a small trough filled with colour changing coral that is sensitive to pressure changes and will change hues if you get close. All in all these two dives were the highlight of the trip so far just from sheer variety.


Pro Tier Snorkeling

Energized by the morning’s dives and revitalized by some food and a short half-nap/half musical interlude I took advantage of the tide finally aligning better and went down and across the road to snorkel. The caretaker had told me the night before that some young teen had stayed there the year before and drawn a map of the lagoon’s corals/swimthroughs. It turned out to be quite a great little map and I spent the rest of my time in Savusavu snorkeling around the lagoon.

There was a reef superstructure with a few large rocks and caves, coral outcroppings and sudden drops into deep tunnels and pits. I’m not a good enough free diver to really mess with the swimthroughs without a tank but I still dove down to play peekaboo with some of the larger specimins hiding just out of sight.

The truly spectacular thing about the snorkeling was that at high tide you could very easily get over the edge of the reef and swim right over the 25/30 meter drop. The barrier between two environments is where you often see the neatest stuff and the visibility was just astounding. When the sun was out you could clearly see the life on the bottom and a fair ways out into the deeper lagoon, all while still protected by the outer reef. While my other stops on this trip have all had amazing snorkeling just offshore, this was a spot that the owner of the lodge called some of the best snorkeling in Fiji and I agree with him. A snorkel in that bay is easily on par for variety of sea life and sheer beauty with a good portion of the full scuba dives I’ve ever done.

There was so much life hidden under the placid waters of the lagoon (here mid-ish tide)

While I have many other places in Fiji I would want to add on if I come back I would seriously consider going back there just for a snorkel. The fact that there are still a ton of dive sites there, a marine park that begs for a special trip and another nearby island that’s supposed to be amazing (though rainy enough at this time of year that I didn’t visit this time) just means I’ll need to come back


I’m just now realizing I forgot to mention one of the coolest non-aquatic parts of this stop. Every night at dusk I sat out front of my bure and watched squadrons of bats turning around the sky hunting the evening bugs. None of these guys were small and a few were of a size that they’re probably in the flying fox category. They dove and swooped all over the valley down to the sea and it was wild just how many there were every night. I find bats absolutely fascinating and while I may not have made it over to the more rainforesty island of Taveuni this trip where the rarest of them lives but I’m glad I got such a display. Sadly none of my pictures came out though, not surprising given light conditions alas.

Imagine bats swooping all around the trees here a bit later that night…

In any case, after one last meal back in town and a stressed sleep (I kept worrying that my alarm wouldn’t go off in time and I was waiting for snorkel gear to dry overnight and pack at 6am) I caught a very early morning, equally tiny flight back to Viti Levu and went in search of the last stop of my Fiji journey.

But that’s the next post…

Top Gear Pass and Imperial Walker

Looking down the pass

Those of you who are old version Top Gear fans may have watched the Vietnam special they did many years ago now. The middle section of the special has them having (silly) suits made then driving their bikes over the Hai Van pass between Hoi An/Danang and Hue. This is the point where if I recall correct Jeremy briefly starts liking biking and all three guys are in awe of the view. Originally I’d planned to do this journey too but in the opposite direction, but the flight issues I mentioned in the last post made it easier to do it this way then fly out of Hue or (as eventually happened) just backtracking on a short leg of the train. In doing some research I’d found a good small company that took you across on motorbikes for all of $40usd which sounded tons more appealing than a tourbus.

The headland beyond the pass

One last great breakfast at the Hotel Hai Au (as always I also use this blog as a reminder for myself 😉 ) then out front to meet ‘Dr. Phu’ who plastic wrapped my pack then loaded it all up on the bike before we set off. I’d fully expected this to be a pretty direct trip with a few photo stops but Dr. Phu was intent on showing off his country as best he could entirely to my delight. We exited Hoi An by zig zagging through the rice paddies surrounding the town (some of which I’d wrong turned by on the way to the beach the day before) then moved on past shrimp farms and the ‘vegetable village’ that apparently grows much of the produce for the restaurants in town. I was amazed at how many small guesthouses were even out here but the ‘homestay’ concept is popular with some visitors here, though I imagine you’d want your own bike staying some of these places. It was probably an hour before we actually hit the road back towards Da Nang.

Marble Mountains

Our first actual stop and chance to rest my poor still not fully healed (c’mon already) tailbone was the Marble Mountains. These are five marble monoliths on the outskirts of Da Nang which are named for the elements and have pagodas and shrines dotting them. Surrounding the bases are marble carvers though the villagers now import chinese marble rather than further mining from their tourist attractions. Again, if you watched the top gear special this is where James’ present came from.

Marble Mountains – Thuy Son

The major one of these Marble Mountains is Thuy Son or the Water Mountain. A quick trip up in the world’s hottest elevator revealed a gorgeous garden of sorts, paths carved everywhere between Pagodas and natural caves housing shrines. The one downer was of course that a mega hotel is being constructed between the mountain and the ocean, spoiling the view completely.

Thuy Son Cave Shrine

Back on the road we snaked through the busy streets of Da Nang, crossed the Dragon Bridge, (An arched bridge with dragon heads added as though it were a sea monster) and started heading up the coast. A tunnel was completed somewhere around a decade ago which thankfully cuts the traffic down though fuel trucks and others still have to use the pass. Dr. Phu stopped us just up the first couple switchbacks where there was a superb view of the beach already far below and a glimpse of the train track I’d return on in a few days time. What a phenomenal view, especially on probably the best day I’d had weatherwise thus far.

The Hai Van Pass

We stopped several more times in the pass for photos. Not so long ago this region was the extreme north of South Vietnam and the pass was an important military site. The former DMZ lies just north of Hue but even here at the top of the pass there are the ruins of a former lookout station/bunker and bullet holes still clearly visible everywhere. The view in both directions is phenomenal, winding tarmac zigzagging down to the sea in both direction, unfortunately the all too everpresent garbage problem in Vietnam is pretty bad as well.

Fort at the top of the pass riddled with bullets
On the way down

Now at the bottom of the pass we arrived at a fishing village called Lang Co. There’s a series of lagoons along the coast here with semi salt water and a large number of oyster farms. Phu showed me in his words the ‘fancy fancy’ restaurants then took me to a place he said locals eat. I suspect it’s more likely ‘place he gets a small commission’ but there were definitely a good mix of locals and tourists and I got a lounge chair under a palapa staring out at breaking waves and eating some reasonable food. At his insistence I tried some local scallops done in chili and peanut, scallops are not usually my thing but these were delicious. I also had a cider and some shrimp noodles and just enjoyed the view and the breeze for what felt like a couple hours. Dr. Phu was actually from Hue so he was in no great hurry.

Lang Co

As we moved onward eventually he continued to take us along the road less travelled hitting a couple of minor passes rather than taking tunnels and eventually winding up at a local swimming spot called Elephant Springs. I wasn’t expecting this (nor did he really explain) so I wasn’t wearing my suit but in the end no regrets. Reading the reviews of this place afterwards I gather it’s a mega scam in busy season. Basically a rushing crystal clear river that forms a series of natural pools as it drops down there are bamboo huts with mats along the edge all the way down. I gather if you’re here on your own motorbike as a tourist you get charged the admittance fee then someone tries to charge you to swim, to sit in a hut etc etc etc with trash everywhere. I think because of the time of year mostly what we saw was locals rebuilding the huts. Apparently it floods quite severely in the rainy season and washes everything away… They should take the hint. The reviews on TripAdvisor make it sound awful with people putting up tarps and whatnot to make extra pools and basically just messing with what was probably originally a very naturally gorgeous place. The fact that we were off season and the place was just setting up again saved us from the worst of it and it was nice to cool off by dipping my feet in the water but still kind of sad. I hate to keep comparing the two countries but when I was at the falls in Kanchanaburi in Thailand there were such strict controls about bringing any plastic in and everything stayed pristine as a result.

Elephant Springs

As we made our final run in to the old imperial capital of Hue it was some mildly exciting highway driving with a couple minor stops for photos. I was glad to get off before it was fully dark but overall it had been a spectacular (and much fuller than expected) day on the bike. With a thank you and a hefty tip I sent Dr. Phu home to his family, checked in to a hotel room with a bathtub!!! (that I later found out wouldn’t hold water) and headed out to explore the cuisine of Hue.

Dr. Phu and Some Guy

I’d seen the same recommendation three different places and boy did it not disappoint. 130000 Dong ($7.50) five course set menu to try a bunch of ‘royal’ Hue specialties. It all came at once and the tiny woman who brought it all showed me how to eat the things I’d never seen before. Little Banh Beo steamed rice dumplings with shrimp and green onion that you poured a bit of sauce on then shot almost like an oyster. Banh khoai which are like an extra fried banh xeo just encrusted with shrimp. Fried spring rolls and fresh rice wrapped charbroiled pork, the juiciest things with peanut sauce. And Nem Lui, lemongrass pork grilled on a skewer of lemongrass that you then wrap with veggies in rice paper and go to town on with more sauce. Definitely one of the highlights of the trip so far meal wise.

Dinner
The DMZ bar

The big attraction in Hue is the Imperial Citadel which was the seat of the monarchy in the 1800s up until the end of the dynasty in 1945. Most of the other side of the Perfume River is encircled with massively thick stone walls with narrow archways constantly flooded with traffic. Things could definitely be set up better but eventually you arrive at the inner citadel/enclosure and buy your ticket. As with seemingly every other cultural site in central Vietnam the Americans did a number on this one too, though the French went to town as well. According to my guidebook only 20 of 148 buildings survived. Soon after entering you can see a well done video where a South Korean university has done graphical reconstructions of some of the areas. Restoration work is ongoing however and some of the remaining structures are breathtaking.

The Perfume River
The outer wall… yes that is the path to get in squeezing next to bikes and cabs

It was a baking hot day for exploring and despite buying some extra water on the way over there was definitely some extended breaks when I found a particularly shady and breezy spot. Highlights of the enclosure were probably the front gate and the main audience hall as well as some of the surrounding temples. The detail work in some of the tiling is just breathtaking and I loved the lanterns.

I loved the detailing of the lamps with porcelain screens
The Ngo Mon Gate (1833)

A solid bird will be flipped to Lonely Planet for recommending doing it counter clockwise when you can’t actually exit back through the front but have to go out the side which meant a fairly massive detour to get back to where you originally came in. Something’s probably changed since this edition of the guidebook came out but it makes absolutely no sense how they’ve arranged things. You think they’d want to make things easy on pedestrians. Still, it was 100% worth the visit. I finished off the afternoon with a late lunch of a bowl of the other Hue specialty: Bun Bo Hue, a beef noodle soup to die for. Despite that fact that I love it, despite the fact that I was starving, a small bowl at this recommended place absolutely destroyed me and I barely finished it before sloshing back to the hotel for a shower.

One of the restored buildings

In order to make my flight the next morning out of Da Nang I was having to take a fairly early train, so I spent my evening having a few drinks and some appetizers at an odd little bar in the tourist zone listing to a band play surf-y covers of pop songs until I figured it was bedtime. I wouldn’t have minded spending another day in Hue and heading out to some of the surrounding stuff but in order to have time to see Saigon and still go diving I figured this was the best plan. There’s always next time.

Boss Hogg

This was a really great section of the trip, if you’re in the area I can’t recommend Dr. Phu and HueToGoTours enough. I would imagine you can hire him for other tours as well but the Hai Van pass was definitely a fun thing to check off my list. I really appreciated seeing more of the countryside and getting to stop and look around places without a busload of other people right on my heels.

Selfies!

Up next: Ho Chi Minh City/Saigon

Beautiful Bun at the Blue Butterfly

People have asked me why exactly I wanted to come to Vietnam. It was a combination of things really but food was high up there. Given the previous days revelation about the tourist sites I’d done a slight pivot and booked a cooking class recommended in a couple places for the day instead of leaving it until later in the trip as originally planned. After enjoying the ones I’d done in Thailand so much it seemed a no brainer. This one took place right inside the restaurant with the head chef and involved a market trip and four dishes particular (at least these variations) to the Ha Noi area.

It was an early start though, not that that really mattered as I have yet to be able to sleep in here at all even when trying. For whatever reason they insisted on doing hotel pickup even though it was all of two blocks away and I’d walked past it at least 3 times at this point. It turned out my ‘pickup’ was the chef walking over to get me just as I finished my breakfast and we walked back together to the Blue Butterfly, built into a couple levels of a pretty, ancient house.

The Blue Butterfly

His name was Hung, but he informed us that his friends called him ‘Pickle’ because of how he smelled in a sweaty kitchen and that we could call him Hung Pickle if we liked (pause a moment for your childish giggle.) Rounding out our small group were: another Canadian, a young kid from Montreal riding a motorbike from Ho Chi Minh City to the North. An outback station nurse from Australia. And a Brit/French couple now living in Hong Kong who were just over for a few days to get some dental work done (apparently that’s a thing.)

Pho Phixins

Hung Pickle started us off making the broth for Pho Bo (excuse the lack of proper letters any Viet readers as this keyboard is a nightmare for trying) from scratch. Normally this would be left going for much longer but we started it first so it got a few hours before we ate at least. Basically just a stack of bones and a giant tea strainer thing full of herbs and spices including a little bit of ha long bay sea worm as Hung was from Ha Long. I can’t imagine that’s an ingredient I’ll find at home.

Market

Broth bubbling away we headed out to the central Ha Noi food market which Hung said catered to most of the restaurants in the city. It was a fascinating place, much more hectic than the ones I’d visited in Bangkok. Apparently (and I read this in a guide book as well) many of the smaller stall folks are the actual farmers who grow the products and Hung seemed to be trying to buy from these (as much as I could tell.) Along the way he had us try a bunch of produce including some deliciously juicy red dragonfruit as well as a ginger sticky rice chew that felt like it would have been a solid pick me up for a wobbly stomach. We ended up picking up most of our herbs, some veggies, some fresh rice noodles and paper and a big hunk of pork shoulder.

Beans and Bean-adjacent things
Rolls have been rolled

We started by making Ha Noi style spring rolls which were similar to the ones I’ve made at home before, though with the rice paper being so fresh no soaking was necessary which made the whole process more speed friendly. I’d love to say mine were massively better than everyone else’s but it’s been a while since I made them so I will only say they were solid. We fried them up then set them aside for another high temp fry just before eating.

Banana Flower

Next up was Banana flower salad. In many ways this was quite similar to Som Tam in thailand (and indeed he indicated you could make it with green papaya or mango.) The flower is from the outer leaves of the big flower pods sliced thinly so they form springy curls. The dressing is a similar concoction of vinegar and lime and fish sauce and it’s all topped with peanut and (optionally) chicken.

Banana Flower Salad

Lastly was the Bun Cha which is the dish that Obama and Bourdain noshed on in Ha Noi. It’s fairly simple, rice noodles and herbs with a combo of charbroiled pork slices and meatballs served with a dipping sauce but very tasty. Hung put a few of us to work hand mincing the pork for the meatballs then built up a charcoal fire in his cooking station in order to cook the two racks.

Bun Cha Patties and Slices

Once all the work was done we settled down in the restaurant with a beer and devoured our food while having a discussion about medical care, the corona virus hysteria and China in general as the Hong Kong couple had previously lived in Shanghai and was saying how they were pleased to be in HK for this particular crisis. The food was delicious, the Bun Cha in particular.

End Results (not pictures: Pho Bo Tay as we had that after)

That said, overall as an experience it didn’t quite measure up to either of the Thai classes, mostly because this was only about 50% hands on most of which was prep work. Both thai classes had individual cooking stations and we did pretty much 90% of everything. This one was also a bit more expensive but I don’t begrudge that, it was still a bargain. The five of us all sat talking for a while but eventually it became clear that the staff wanted to shut up for the post lunch/pre dinner cleanup/break so we wished each other good travels and headed onward.

Our Crew

After a break back in the room to digest and confirm the times for the boat pickup the next day. I decided to see if the Water Puppet theatre was open as one of the classmates had said it was an interesting production. Given it was all of I think 10 bucks for the best seat in the house I figured why not. You’re seated in this odd auditorium with what looks like a deep pool at the front with unfamiliar musical instruments perched in the wings and a screen in behind. Out comes a band and suddenly odd puppet figures emerge from behind the screen or just directly from other the waves. I found out after that there is an english audio guide to the process but a good portion of them were self explanatory. Intricate puppets, often more animated than you expect are controlled via mechanisms under the water and appear to either swim through it or dance above it depending on the story. Definitely worth the money but I was glad the show was only about 45 minutes as the concept was wearing a bit thin after a while. Ymmv of course and the audio guide might have helped.

water puppets

Much to my frustration I emerged to see people walking across the lake bridge to the Pagoda as the theatre was on the lake front. A quick glance at my phone confirmed that yes everything had reopened earlier that day after being ‘sprayed’ the day before. I would have hopped a cab earlier to check out a few of the closed spots had I known, now I was leaving the next day and when I returned it would be sunday when some of the spots regularly close anyway. ARGH. I’ll be back in Hanoi at the end of the trip as I fly out of here but was hoping to cut it reasonably close and/or use it as a base for a day trip or two.


I actually tried to go check out the Obama/Bourdain bun cha place for dinner after that but it was a longer walk than expected and I arrived just as they were closing. I ended up just taking a long sweaty walk in the muggy weather and finished my night at a place called Chopsticks another classmate had recommended which did updated modern takes on local faves. The place was absolutely packed, by far the busiest I’d seen a restaurant in the old quarter but I managed to scround a place at the bar. I ended up having Bun Cha again anyway as theirs had some flourishes on it including sous vide pork belly in place of the charbroiled pork. The waiter somewhat sheepishly told me that they were out of Chopsticks (at a place called Chopsticks GASP) but the food was excellent and they had a great local cider.

I’m going to leave this a short post as the boat trip is best treated as a whole, thanks for reading and shoot me a note if you have any questions or recommendations as I’m still here two weeks.